19 Signs and Reasons She Is Uncomfortable Around You
WhatToGetMy Instructional Article
- Sometimes a lady could be uncomfortable or nervous being around you or talking to you.
- This could be as a result of any one of a number of reasons that could either have to do with her, with you or with both of you.
- It is important to notice these signs so that you can take appropriate action to ease her discomfort.
When talking to a lady or simply being around her, you may have noticed some signs she is uncomfortable around you, and believe it or not, this is quite common especially if you do not have a personal relationship with her.
A major reason for this is that this world has not been very fair to women for a long time and this has led to women constantly having to be on alert to danger such that they may be uncomfortable around people that they feel the slightest bit off about.
There are of course other reasons why she would be uncomfortable around you and we will explore some of them.
Whatever the reason may be, however, you need to look out for signs that a lady is uncomfortable around you for your sake as well as hers because a person experiencing discomfort might act out against the perceived cause of the discomfort thereby leading to more serious consequences.
9 Reasons a lady might be uncomfortable around you
1. You intimidate her
It is human nature to avoid those that intimidate them because it is not a great feeling to have. If you intimidate a lady therefore, you can almost expect that she will try to avoid you and if she has to be in your presence, she might manifest signs of discomfort.
Related article: Signs your coworkers are intimidated by you.
2. She has social anxiety
A person that has social anxiety will not want to be in social settings as relating with other people is a thing of fear to them.
If a lady is making you ask yourself, “why is she nervous around me?” it could simply be that she has social anxiety and thus finds being around you difficult which is why she acts in a manner that an uncomfortable person would.
3. She likes you
On a positive note, it is worthy of note that sometimes a girl is nervous around a guy simply because she has a crush on him and the butterflies in her stomach inspire a feeling of nervousness that makes her give you an uncomfortable look.
We are not saying that you should immediately jump to the conclusion that she likes you if you find that a lady is nervous around you but it is a possibility. You should, however, look for other signs that she likes you to safely rule this out.
4. She was abused by someone in your position
When an incident traumatizes us, it stays with us for a long time – maybe even forever. To avoid getting traumatized again, we tend to try to avoid whatever type of situation it was that led to us being traumatized.
If you are with a lady therefore, and notice signs she is uncomfortable around you, it could be because someone in your position such as a colleague, boss, or romantic partner, did something to her that traumatized her and now she can’t help but feel that there is a chance that you, being in that same position, might do the same.
5. She has insecurities
Signs of nervousness in girls could be the result of them feeling insecure about something that they feel you will judge them negatively on.
Insecurity about our bodies is one of the major sources of insecurity there are, and, according to a survey undertaken by the British House of Commons Women and Equalities Committee, a lot of people don’t think highly of their body image.
Should the lady in question be one of these people, we can expect that she will most likely be on edge the whole time she is around you stemming from a fear that you feel as negatively about her insecurity as she does.
6. Your behavior makes her uncomfortable
When a girl is nervous around you, what does it mean?
Well, it could mean that she does not like the way you behave or your general demeanor.
She might for instance consider you overly loud, painfully unfunny, too touchy, or maybe too sexual in conversation.
There are several other reasons why she could find your behavior discomforting that would lead to her exhibiting an uncomfortable reaction around you so you need to keep in mind that you could be the problem.
7. She has personal problems
You might also pick up on signs a woman is nervous around you simply because she could be going through some personal issues.
For instance, she could be going through some family problems that have her so stressed out that she just wants to be alone or somewhere away from you and everyone else.
8. She feels unwanted
If a lady feels like she is not wanted in a place, she might exhibit awkward body language because she doesn’t feel comfortable there.
To be fair, how many of us can feel comfortable in a place where we feel that people don’t like us or want us there?
9. She doesn’t want you to think she likes you
Have you noticed signs a girl is uncomfortable around you when you try to talk to her, especially when you try to be flirtatious? She might be acting that way because she does not want to give you the impression that she likes you in that way.
We are not saying that she doesn’t like you as a person but maybe she just doesn’t like you as a prospective partner so her body language exhibits discomfort to show you that.
Related article: Signs your coworkers don’t like you
10 Signs a lady is uncomfortable around you
10. She avoids eye contact
One of the major signs someone is uncomfortable around you is that they will avoid eye contact when speaking to you.
Experts say that eye contact is initiated as a way to show interest in the other person which is the exact opposite of what a person who is uncomfortable with someone wants. They will therefore avoid eye contact as a way of expressing their discomfort at being around the person they are uncomfortable with.
11. She fidgets/ fiddles a lot
An uncomfortable lady will try to distract herself from the situation or person that is making her uncomfortable.
If you feel like you are making a lady uncomfortable, therefore, you should look to see if she is engaging in activities such as playing with her hair, neck, clothes, or anything around her. Also, check to see if she is on her phone a lot because these are all avenues of escape for her to avoid the discomfort that she feels.
12. She is stuttering
When a person is uncomfortable around people, it is likely that they will lose coordination and this can show in their speech patterns with stuttering.
This is because being around someone you are uncomfortable with makes you stressed and because of the direct link between stress and stuttering, one can’t help but stutter sometimes when they are uncomfortable.
Should you notice that the lady in question is stuttering and in your previous interactions with her or based on what you know, she doesn’t often stutter, it could be that she is uncomfortable around you and this is manifesting as a stutter.
13. She is blushing
You want to know how to tell if a girl is nervous around you? Look to see how often she blushes when you speak.
This is usually more common when a lady is uncomfortable around you because she likes you.
Her body will snitch on her by sending blood to her face to show her excitement at being around you and also her discomfort because she isn’t quite sure of how to act around you in a way that wouldn’t embarrass her.
14. She is talking too much
Sometimes people talk too much to hide the fact that they are anxious or uncomfortable in a certain situation and this is more evident in those that have social anxiety.
So yeah, if you find that Janice from the office cannot stop going on and on when she is around you, there is a likelihood that Janice is not comfortable around you and this led to her developing anxiety which then led to her talking too much.
15. She is talking too little
When a lady is uncomfortable around you, especially if she doesn’t like you or want to give the impression that she is interested in you, she might try to limit conversation by, for instance, giving you one-worded responses.
The goal is simply – limit the conversation so that we don’t talk about much and he will see that I am uncomfortable around him and will either stop talking or go away.
16. She blocks her body
If you are acting in a way that is making someone uncomfortable, they might engage in subconscious and symbolic acts of defense aimed at creating a sort of barrier between the both of you.
They will, for instance, cross their arms and/ or legs or maybe pick up a pillow or bag and place it on their lap to block their body.
Seeing a lady engage in any of this behavior when around you is therefore one of the signs she is uncomfortable around you.
17. She is pointing her feet (and body) away from you
Maybe you are talking to a woman and you feel like, “she looks uncomfortable around me.” A subtle sign that you can use to confirm this is to look at the direction her feet (and sometimes body) are facing.
You see, experts believe that when a person is body language uncomfortable around someone, they will point their feet in a different direction from the person, and more often than not, this happens involuntarily.
So if you are talking to Janice once again and you notice this, you should probably leave Janice alone for some time.
18. She keeps changing her stance and backing away
Much like using things to block her body, a woman who is uncomfortable around someone will usually try to set up a barrier between themselves and the person causing the discomfort by trying to put some distance between them and that person.
Should you notice that when you are talking to a woman, she keeps changing the way she is sitting or standing such that there is more space between the two of you. Or that she less subtly takes a step backward when you stand close to her, she is probably uncomfortable being around you.
19. She avoids you often
I am not quite sure about you but if a girl is nervous around me, I’d expect that she would avoid me as often as she can so that she can avoid that feeling. This is also a stance taken by most people.
If a certain lady keeps avoiding you by leaving a room when you come in, taking a different route when she sees you, or just generally finding reasons not to be around you, that is pretty much all the proof you need to know that she is uncomfortable around you.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do you know if someone is uncomfortable around you?
Some signs someone is nervous around you include:
- They avoid eye contact with you
- They stutter when talking to you
- They avoid you
- They point their feet away from you when talking to you
- They talk too much or too little
- They fidget a lot when talking to you
What does it mean when someone is uncomfortable around you?
There are several reasons why a person might feel uncomfortable around you including:
- that you intimidate them
- that they have some personal problems
- they may also have insecurities
- that they don’t like your character
- that they have social anxiety
What makes someone uncomfortable?
A person can be uncomfortable if:
- they feel like an outcast in a social setting or that they are not welcome there.
- they have some deep-seated insecurities
- they have social anxiety
- they feel intimidated by someone or some people
- they relate their current situation to an event that traumatized them
- they are around someone they don’t like
In conclusion
When a woman is uncomfortable around you, the solution largely depends on why she is uncomfortable around you. You can’t very well handle a woman being interested in you the same way you would a woman who is uncomfortable because of social anxiety.
The best thing to do therefore is to simply take a step back because you won’t know which is which.
And if you are worried that you might miss out on a potential love interest because you aren’t approaching a lady who is uncomfortable around you because she likes you, be comforted in knowing that there will be other signs and she might even approach you herself instead.
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