21 Signs You’re Forcing Yourself to Love Someone
WhatToGetMy Instructional Article
Signs you are forcing yourself to love someone are always glaring to the outside eye, even to you, only if you could pause and have a rethink about the relationship. I once went into this relationship that took everything in me to get it going; I congratulate myself every time I think of it because I realize;
- That depression and confusion could make one do many things they don't like doing, including forcing love in a relationship.
- We all are stronger than we give ourselves credit for; this strength comes in ways we do not expect; forcing yourself to love someone takes a lot of strength.
- Most people do not always go for what's best for them, maybe because we always think we don't deserve the best. Forcing yourself to like someone can be challenging, not to mention forcing yourself to love someone; is this the best for anyone?
- Pity is not love; many people end up with someone out of compassion, not because they love them. Being forced into a relationship through a pity-party display/story will only lead to unhappiness in that relationship.
- Eternity is a long time to spend with someone you are forcing yourself to love; only if you realize early enough and make the right decision while you still can. Can you make yourself love someone? Love comes. Naturally, it shouldn't be forced.
There are many signs to look for when someone is being forced into a relationship; these signs can also be signs you’re forcing yourself to love someone. They include;
1. YOU ARE NOT EXCITED ABOUT HIM
How could you not be? Seeing your boyfriend should excite you and make you feel so happy, or like butterflies in your tummy, except, of course, you are just forcing yourself into the relationship.
2. YOU HATE BEING AROUND HIM
You want to leave every time you two are together. You feel better staying away from him than with him; this is only a sign you’re forcing yourself to love someone. Are you supposed to hate being with someone you are dating?
3. YOU TRY TO AVOID THEM AT ALL COST
When he calls, you find one excuse or the other why you shouldn’t meet up. This makes you feel better than going on a date with him; being forced into a relationship you do not want to be in the first place makes you want to avoid the very person you should be spending time with
4. YOU FEEL FRUSTRATED
Forcing love in a relationship can be frustrating. Everything about the person irritates and annoys you; his calls, texts, presence, laughter, even the very thought of them. How to stop forcing yourself on someone is to find a way to end that relationship; that’s if there was any relationship in the first place. You don’t want to be frustrated for the rest of your life.
5. YOU ARE NOT PROUD OF HIM
This isn’t good, but it is a core sign you’re forcing yourself to love someone. You feel ashamed walking side by side with them on the street; you avoid introducing them as your date, you want to keep your relationship secret, etc. can you make yourself love someone you are not proud of?
6. YOU DON’T EVEN REMEMBER THEM
Imagine going through the whole day without a call or text to someone you claim to be in a relationship with; no matter how busy you may be, you will always make time for someone you love, not someone you are forcing yourself to love. If you love them, they will be in your thoughts all day; you don’t forget them, except you are forcing yourself to like them.
7. YOU STILL LOOK OUT FOR ANOTHER PARTNER
Your heart still feels single; your social media status still says single or complicated, all because deep down, you are still on the lookout for someone else whom you will truly love and care for. Forcing love in a relationship is stupid and a waste of time.
8. YOUR HEART IS WITH SOMEONE ELSE
You are in the company of your boyfriend, but your heart is with your ex; what does that mean? You’re forcing yourself to like someone, and this someone is your recent boyfriend. When he touches you, you wish it was your ex’s touch; when he speaks, you hear your ex’s voice; you compare all his actions with that of your ex and wish he would be more like him.
9. YOU FEEL UNHAPPY IN THE RELATIONSHIP
Forcing yourself to love someone can make you sad; relationships are meant to be enjoyed. An average person should be happier once in a relationship with someone they love. Being forced into a relationship can lead to sadness and an unhappy ending.
10. DEEP DOWN YOU KNOW THEY ARE NOT THE ONE
Would you say yes if he proposes today and asks you to marry him? Or would you give one reason or the other to stall? Think about it; deep down, you know he is not the one; why then are you forcing yourself to be with him?
11. YOU WANT TO END IT
You have been looking for a way to end the relationship, sometimes not because he has done anything wrong. Or maybe the reason you are still with him is that you can’t find a reason to end it? This is a sign you’re forcing yourself to love someone. You have to stay put in the relationship, not because you love him but because you can’t find a reason to leave.
12. YOU NEVER APOLOGIZE EVEN WHEN YOU ARE WRONG
Disagreements occur in relationships; any one of the couples could be the reason for the disagreements, but when the apology always comes from one person, this is a sign the other person may not truly be in love, but maybe forcing himself to love.
13. YOU DO NOT PLAN FOR THE RELATIONSHIP
A relationship involves a lot of planning from both parties. When do you not make any plans in your relationship? Where is the relationship going? Maybe the planning is coming from the other person and not you because you’re forcing yourself to love someone you don’t care enough to love.
14. YOU NEVER GIVE ROOM FOR INTIMACY
Being forced into a relationship makes you lose interest in being intimate with the person. Since you feel compelled or irritated around you, you would prefer not to move the relationship up by being close with them. You already have all your excuses ready; they may look genuine, yet in the long run, it’s all because you’re forcing yourself to love someone you don’t even like.
15. YOU NEVER SAY I LOVE YOU
If you love your partner, you wouldn’t be hesitant to tell them you love them, except you are not really into them or forcing yourself to love them. Forcing love in a relationship can easily be detected in the things your partner says or how they say it. The chart below explains a survey on how many times couples said “I love you” in a relationship. You can read more about the survey here
16. YOU TWO NEVER AGREE
Two cannot walk together except they agree; if you are always antagonizing each other, how can you stay in a relationship? So you remain in it because you have other things like money, security, or even fame that he fulfills. This is a sign you’re forcing yourself to love someone with whom you are never on the same page. Maybe you don’t agree because you lack the right conversation topics, you may like these 23 things to talk about with your boyfriend.
17. YOU HATE HIM
There are many reasons to hate someone whom you are in an intimate relationship with, yet you can’t leave the relationship;
- You are forced to stay in the relationship for fear of your life
- You have no choice in the matter
- You are in it for political or religious reasons
- You have been brainwashed to think that you can make yourself like someone with time.
- You have been made to believe that forcing yourself to love someone is for the best.
Forcing love in a relationship can be very dangerous for the mental state of the individuals involved.
18. YOU PITY THEM
Once upon a time, a boy meets a girl, the girl gets pregnant and tells the boy about it. The boy is happy about the baby but doesn’t think he loves the girl enough to be with her, yet he accepts to support her for the baby’s sake. The girl wants the boy to let her live-in, but the boy doesn’t like the idea as he thinks she would be better off on her own, so they do not make another mistake. Girl doesn’t like that, so she devised a story; she told the boy that her parents and siblings died and she had nowhere else to go, nor anyone to care for her while she was pregnant. The boy feels pity and steps in; she could live with him until the baby is born. The girl is living in and begins to play the role of a girlfriend; she seduces the boy to sleep with her and keeps manipulating him to make decisions that involve getting married to her. Boy is unhappy, he tries to end it, but every time she threatens to kill herself and the baby… the boy has to find a way to force himself to love her for the sake of the baby.
The story above is an example of being forced into a relationship out of pity. Pity is not love; in fact, those who end up with someone out of compassion tend to realize in the long run that they are forcing themselves to love someone they do not love.
19. YOU OWE THEM
Some persons are in a relationship with the wrong person because they feel indebted to the person and think they are paying back their debt by being in a relationship with the said person. Are you in the relationship because you want to be or because you are indebted to them? Do you even love this person? Are you forcing yourself to love them? Would you have preferred to be with someone else than them? The debt you owe someone doesn’t guarantee that you will fall in love with them. Can you make yourself love someone? I doubt that. This is why this is a sign you may be forcing yourself to love someone.
20. YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT THEIR DREAMS
Can you be in a relationship with someone and not care about their dreams? Remember, it’s their future, where they are going, or where they want to be. How can one sync with their partner if they don’t care about all that? This is a sign that you’re forcing yourself to love someone. If their dreams do not interest you, it means your interests do not align.
21. YOU DON’T BELIEVE IN THEM
You don’t believe in their vision, you don’t even believe in what he says, so if he says “I love you,” you do not believe it for reasons best known to you. This is a sign you’re forcing yourself to love someone. Why exactly are you with someone you don’t believe in? How do you go each day knowing you don’t trust them or believe in whatever they are doing?
FAQs
1. How do you know if you are forcing yourself to love someone?
You will know if you’re forcing yourself to love someone by checking on the 21 signs. You’re forcing yourself to love someone, read the article and get your answers.
2. Can you force yourself to be in love with someone?
Can you make yourself love someone? Love comes. Naturally, it cannot be forced.
3. Can love be forced?
Love is inborn; it can also be acquired. Some people have tricked others into loving them; can we call that forced love?
4. How do you stop forcing yourself to love someone?
Talk to them about it and end the relationship.
CONCLUSION
Forcing love in a relationship can cause mental damage; love is a natural phenomenon, it cannot be moved. There are many signs you’re forcing yourself to love someone; they include; you being frustrated in the relationship, not being proud of the person, hating the person, etc. these signs will help you discover when you are forcing yourself to love someone.
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