Why Does He Text Me Everyday if He Only Wants Friendship? The 15 Main Reasons You Should Know
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Why does he text me everyday if he only wants friendship? This might sound strange because, at first sight, it is quite normal for friends to be in touch all the time. However, the question takes on a different dimension for opposite sexes and especially when one friend wants more than just a friendly relationship. Once again, nothing serious is going on. The second persists, probably because he is unaware of the other’s feelings. But what if he knows them and they have already discussed it? To understand this issue properly, we need to analyze all its aspects.
There are three of them:
- ex-lovers ;
- long-time friends who don’t know what they want from their relationship;
- long-time friends, one of whom is in love with the other and the latter is in a relationship with another partner.
Let us analyze each case and its specificities.
If he texts me all the time, does he love me or does he have other intentions.
This is the most painful case because deep feelings are at stake. Why continue to write to the ex-partner if the love relationship is already over? In this context, when a guy texts you everyday what does that mean?
1- As long as there is life, there is hope…
This is a common reaction of the abandoned partner. Their feelings for the other person remain unchanged. He or she wants to re-establish the relationship, even though he or she knows that the feelings of the ex-partner are no longer the same. He or she sends the texts hoping, eventually, the one who ended the relationship will remember their happy moments and want to renew.
Here, it would be fair to ask, why does he or she keep texting me when we agreed we would remain friends. If he’s not too intrusive and his behavior doesn’t particularly bother you, there’s no need to make an issue of it. Explain to him again the nature of your relationship and if, despite everything, he persists, simply say: text me if you want.
2- Habit is second nature…
The separation went smoothly and everything seems to go well in the best of all worlds. Nevertheless, one of the partners continues to behave towards the other as if they were still a couple. His daily texts end up psychologically exhausting the ex-partner. The ex-partner, who wants to move on, will not understand this relentlessness. In the long run, this can lead to the destruction of any relationship because the assailed partner will keep asking himself : why does he text me all the time?
3- I own you, whether we are together or not…
This is a relationship that will be difficult to end. He or she isn’t about to let go and, for good reason, even when separated, he or she will continue to consider the ex as a partner. Most times, this is not limited to a simple text message. The beleaguered partner will soon realize that nothing has changed. “We talk everyday, as we did when we were together”. This is the conclusion that is always reached. The question here is in which direction should the relationship be oriented.
4- Post relationship jealousy…
You’ve split up and, apparently, all ties are broken. But now you’re getting back together and everything suggests that you’re back together with your ex. He calls you every day, writes to you constantly. In fact, you talk to him (or her) more frequently than to your new partner. This does not mean that the ex wants to come back.
Often he (or she) is even aware that re-establishing the relationship is impossible. Maybe he or she is already in a relationship or has a relationship with another partner. However, the thought that his or her ex is no longer single makes him or her mad.
He cannot complain because his ex-partner is free to do with his life what he wants. Nor can he openly expose his jealousy because they are no longer in a relationship. Don’t strain to understand “why he wants to talk to me everyday?” Let him be, he will calm down sooner or later. These constant text messages will be a way of expressing his frustration.
5- I’m not sure whether I made the right decision…
The decision to end your relationship wasn’t yours, but your ex’s. It was hard to accept, but you did it, and move on. The only problem is that your ex doesn’t seem to leave you in peace, even though he or she is the one who left you. This is a flaw that indecisive partners suffer from.
As a result, he or she will spend the time calling you both wanting to re-establish relations, but fearing to get back together. This situation can last for months or even years. “My friend texts me too much !” For you maybe, but for him, certainly not. He doesn’t even know what kind of relationship he is looking for with you.
6- I want to avoid breaking up like this…
Separation is never easy, but occasionally it can be very painful. Some people hate tense situations and will do everything in their power to ease the atmosphere. If the break-up was unfriendly, they will keep in touch with their ex as long as possible to smooth things over. When he texts you everyday, it will be for you to be able to talk to each other again without hatred and resentment.
So, if your ex calls you repeatedly after the break-up, especially if it was a hard break-up, it is possible that he or she is just trying to lighten the mood.
7- Nostalgia when you hold us…
When you have lived with someone for months or even years, it is impossible to end the relationship and turn the page. If the partners have split up on bad terms, it is easy to write off the relationship and move on. However, when the break-up is gentle, one or occasionally both partners won’t move on quickly.
For some time, they will stay in touch. It will not be surprising if one partner is not rushing to cut the ties. The active partner, in this case, is rarely intrusive. Often you will hear the other say: “He only texts me when he feels like it”. This kind of relationship even has every chance of moving towards a deep friendship.
8- Not being lovers doesn’t mean you can’t be friends…
Sometimes, the ex really wants nothing more than friendship. However, you have to understand that the friendship of an ex-lover and the one from a casual friend will not be expressed in the same way. The former is used to being very close to his ex.
They have shared many intimate moments together, and it is not at all about the physical aspect, but rather psychological. Therefore, it is understandable that his behavior is somewhat different. So, if a guy talks to you everyday does he like you? Your guy likes you, but he is not in love with you.
9- Let’s do it again…
No, this situation has nothing in common with the one described in the sixth paragraph. Here, the exes probably haven’t spoken to, or heard from, each other for quite some time. Maybe they communicate, but rarely, just because they were once together.
Suddenly, one ex becomes quite regular again. At first, his presence won’t be intrusive, but as time goes by, the ex will realize that contact is becoming more frequent. “Why does he text me everyday ?” Well, think twice! He’s not looking for a friendship, even if he hides behind it at first. He aims to win you back.
10- You are mine, or you belong to no one…
This category of people is not to be confused with the second and fourth paragraphs. The latter have difficulty letting go. They may eventually destroy their ex-partner’s life, but that won’t be their goal. They are possessive and find it hard to stop and move on with their lives. Often, after a while, especially once they find another lover, they will stop bothering with the previous one.
People in this category are different. They are fully aware that the break-up is complete. Better still, they can live without the ex. However, they are angry that the ex has dared to leave them. The aim is not to keep in touch, but to destroy systematically the ex’s life. If he or she gets into a relationship, they will haunt him or her, even if they themselves are already in a relationship with someone else.
You will be surprised because you will struggle to understand why he has a girlfriend but texts me everyday? Don’t try to understand and don’t talk to him. Contact the police if necessary and protect yourself immediately. This kind of ex will hurt you physically if the psychological attack fails. Never minimize the scale of the problem or try to make excuses for your ex. The sooner you act, the faster your life will get back on track.
Homicide – Relationship to the suspect – Source: Bradshawadvisory.com
If you think you have nothing to fear, and that all these measures are excessive, take a look at the graph above, especially the first two columns. And just like you, they were sure they had everything under control. Think about it and act.
B- Long-time friends who don’t know what they want from their relationship
Anyone who has seen the cult film starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal can easily understand the point. However, even here, the situation is more ambiguous than it seems.
1- It seems to me that there is something between us, maybe…
It may be a very long-standing relationship. Sometimes you have known each other since childhood. Or it may be a shorter relationship; you’ve known each other since university, or you’ve met in the office. In fact, it doesn’t matter because you get on very well together. At the beginning, it is just a friendship, deep friendship, but nothing more.
Things usually get complicated when the feelings go beyond friendship and neither party wants to admit that their perception has changed. Relationships are so good that they prefer to emphasize the one successful project: the friendship. It is worth mentioning that, in this case, each partner knows the other’s feelings. So, the woman will never ask herself : why this guy texts me everyday? She knows why! However, taking the plunge scares everyone. What if it doesn’t work out between us? What if I’m wrong, and I’m not as in love with him as I think I am?
The fear of failure eventually immobilizes them. Nevertheless, there will always be one who, unknowingly, will always do more than the other. Constant texting every day, phone calls of the day, regular contact even when not needed. Any excuse will be good enough for sending the next message: the colleague at work, the new shirt you saw today, the choice of a pillow you don’t even need, etc.
2- I like you, but I’m scared to do anything…
This is more or less the same logic as the previous case. The only difference is that here, one party clearly understands what he wants. The problem is that he is not sure that the other party shares his feelings.
Not wanting to risk their relationship, but not being able to admit her feelings, he will become very pushy. This will be his way of exposing these feelings, but in safety. Their relationship won’t suffer because they are friends, but the other party will notice the interest. In this case, if you wonder, “We talk everyday what does it mean?” The answer is simple. He is gently trying to seduce you
3- You are the sister (brother) I always wanted…
Is it normal for friends to text everyday? Well, actually, it is. This is more common than you might think. Sometimes, the friend just wants to be a friend. You don’t necessarily fall in love with your soul mate. He (or she) will therefore be active but, however strong his or her feelings may be, they will remain purely platonic. If the other doesn’t fall in love, their relationship will be exceptional.
C- Long-time friends, one of whom is in love with the other and the latter is in a relationship with another partner
This is the most complex case and in some circumstances can even have tragic repercussions.
1- In love, but ready to accept his fate…
The friend will be active, very active even because he secretly hopes to get the attention of his flame. He won’t miss any opportunity to send a message, to talk, to get in touch, etc. However, he will remain realistic. If after a while he realizes that all his efforts are in vain, he will change his attitude and adopt a more reasonable behavior.
2- In love and determined…
This type of person is to be feared, especially if one does not share the same feelings as him. They will put their heart and soul into their goal and won’t stop at anything to achieve it. This means that absolutely nothing will help. No matter how the other person reacts, he or she will remain deaf. Neither pleas nor threats will change their behavior. Worse still, this type of person can follow their loved one wherever he or she goes.
Frequently Asked Questions
1- Should you cut short an ex who wants to continue behaving as if you hadn’t broken up?
It all depends on his or her behavior and goals, as well as yours. Before taking any steps and making radical decisions, try to understand your ex’s motives and whether this situation suits you.
2- What to do if you are in love with your friend and he/she only wants to maintain friendly relations?
To know how to act, you only need to answer honestly to two questions. Do I really need this friendship? Am I able to keep our friendship, regardless of my feelings? If you can answer yes to both questions, you can keep the relationship. If you answer negatively to even one of these questions, then end the relationship, as painful as it may be.
3- Obviously, he’s trying to get me back, but I’m not interested anymore. What to do?
The first thing to do is to analyze the psychological state of this ex. Is he or she ready to accept the facts, or is he or she likely to ignore your needs? If he or she is reasonable and just expresses his or her feelings, gently let him or her know you are no longer interested. Explain that you can still be friends, but they will have to correct their behavior slightly. If it turns out that he is possessive and will never leave you alone, put a stop to any form of relationship. Ignore all the messages he sends you afterwards because responding to them will mean feeding his expectations.
4- I’m in love, I know he doesn’t love me, he keeps writing to me, I suffer, but I can’t imagine life without him. What should I do?
There is one thing you must clearly understand, you are a masochist. Your relationship will make you suffer permanently. Do you really want it? If you can’t imagine your life without this friend, kill the love that is growing inside you. Make a choice, otherwise, sooner or later, you will lose your friend.
5- He writes to me, he likes me, and it’s mutual, but each of us is afraid to take the first step. Should I go for it?
Alice’s Land is wonderful, but reality is far more so. If you are convinced that your feelings for each other are mutual, don’t wait for them to decide. Break the ice and make the first move?
6- I’m in love with him, but I can’t understand his feelings. He keeps writing to me and is by my side, but I’m afraid to be honest. I prefer not to destroy our friendship.
You have to understand that you have a choice between your friendship and your health because your silence will destroy you psychologically. Sometimes it is better to risk and fail than to do nothing and live in permanent regret. Dare!
7- He wants to destroy my life, he keeps writing to me, harassing me. What should I do?
“My friend keeps texting me everyday, I asked him to stop, but he turns a deaf ear.” Don’t ask, don’t beg, and don’t be afraid to be heavy-handed. The biggest mistake anyone in this situation makes is to remember friendship. “We are friends…”, “We have been friends. I want to avoid hurting him, I just want him out of my life.” No, hurt, hurt enough to make the message clear.
8- He texts me everyday but never makes plans to hang out. What should I do?
First, you can’t be sure. He didn’t say anything, and he didn’t confess anything. It is not excluded that he simply does not have the courage to take that step yet. Before you draw conclusions, you should first look at his ambitions. However, avoid behaving like a soldier at war and breaking down every door. If he hasn’t acted yet, maybe he’s not quite ready. If you are tired of waiting, try to question him gently instead. Almost childish hints like, “If somebody as thoughtful as you ever asked me out, I wouldn’t hesitate for a second,” can push him out of his shell. If he’s not in love with you, you’ll understand that as well.
Why does he text me everyday if he only wants friendship: how to react to messages?
He texts me everyday what does it mean? This means that he is madly in love with you and wants to conquer you. It can also mean that he regrets that you have separated and wants to win you back. It could also mean that he is fond of you, but only as a friend. In the end, it could also mean that your friend or ex-lover is a psychopath who should be avoided at all costs.
So, avoid knee-jerk reactions, you may regret it later. Don’t throw a tantrum unless he pushes you to do so. First, try to understand why he can’t get enough of you. Then ask yourself if you want to continue the relationship.
You like these multiple messages, which both hurt and give you hope. Set the record straight once and for all. You don’t want more than his friendship, and apparently you share the same opinion. That’s why this almost abusive presence bothers you. Once again, set the record straight. Explain that despite all the affection you have for him, you would prefer him to be less intrusive. There is no question of being violent or unpleasant. Diplomatically let him know that you would have liked him to behave differently.
He is in a relationship, but he won’t leave you alone, and everything suggests that he wants to be with you. And you want him to be with you more than anything. Don’t wait for your relationship to get out of control. Give him an ultimatum. Here, it won’t be a case of saying, it’s her or me. Just let him know that you would like him to be honest with himself and with his partner. Either end the friendship and move on to more profound relationships, or stop the circus and maintain a platonic relationship.
Whatever the circumstances, it is important to remember that you should never allow relationships to poison your life. Your psychological and even physical well-being is at stake. Are man and woman texting everyday just friends? They can be only friends if both want it. Be honest with yourself and ask the same to those around you do the same.
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