How Do You Know You’re Marrying the Right Person - 13 Signs That They Are Right for You
WhatToGetMy Instructional Article
- When you decide to get married, you invite someone into your life in a massive way for the rest of your life.
- This is an amazing occasion that fills the heart with unprecedented happiness.
- To keep that happiness going, though, you need to have married the right person, or your decision could quickly turn from joy to dread.
Congratulations on finding someone you love so much that you can’t wait to marry them. It is a great feeling to have and one that we hope will last throughout your marriage. To make sure of this, there are several questions you need to ask yourself, including, “how do you know you’re marrying the right person?”
Too many marriages are ending in divorce, which is why this question is so important. However, the answer is not straightforward and requires that you carefully consider the merits of both your partner and your relationship with them. You see, it’s one thing to find a person who has the qualities that you want, and another to be able to relate well with them.
Experts say that the best marriages are those where the relationship, rather than the people involved, are right. Of course, we can’t rule out the effect that being with someone who has qualities you value has on the marriage, as this can strengthen the bond you share.
Basically, marrying the right person means that you not only value their attributes, but that (and mainly so) you can relate well with each other because marriage is not about you or them, but about the both of you.
With that said, here are some signs that you are marrying the right person.
You might be interested in How to Know if You’re Ready to Get Married.
1. You love each other and want to commit
When it comes to marriage, the impact of love and commitment cannot be overstated. Love keeps you together, and commitment is what convinces you to push through the hard times you are sure to face. You, therefore, need to be sure that your partner not only loves you unconditionally but is willing to commit to the marriage. The same goes for you as well.
Also, as much as we hate to admit it, love is not an emotional thing alone; it is also physical. You don’t have to absolutely love the physical attributes of your partner, but you mustn’t be repulsed by them as this discomfort can spell havoc for your marriage.
2. You’re yourself around them
If there is something you cannot outrun for as long as you live, it is who you are – your character and nature. You don’t want to be going into a marriage where this is stifled because you would be forced to live a life of discomfort.
If you’re asking yourself, “am I marrying the right person?” A couple of positive answers would be that you don’t feel judged by your partner. You know you don’t have to hide anything from them; your perceived impurities are known to them, and they have accepted them.
3. You’re sexually compatible
Pew Research Center conducted a survey on married people and asked them, “how do you know if you married the right person?” The results showed that the majority believed that their sexual relationship and satisfaction were quite important.
You will be stuck with this person, and you need to be sure that they can satisfy you sexually. Anything else would open the door to potential affairs and a host of other marital problems.
And if you are a believer in the need to wait for marriage before you have sex, that doesn’t mean you have to go into the marriage blind. You can still have conversations with your partner about what both of you like and how open you both are to fulfilling each other’s desires.
4. You see visions of growing old together
Our dreams are a reality waiting to happen – especially the positive ones. If you can visualize being with your partner in the long term such that you see yourself traveling together, making plans together, and even having kids( if that’s something you’d like), this is a good sign that you are marrying the right person.
It shows that deep within, this is someone that you can actually build a life with, which is why you are already planning out that life.
5. You have compatible views on life
Compatibility is key in a marriage. Experts say that the more compatible you are with your partner, the lower the risk of divorce. Going into a marriage with someone you aren’t compatible with means that you will have to compromise in big areas of your lives, which can create resentment down the line.
Some of the most important ways you should be compatible are:
- Marital roles – what is expected from you and what you expect of them.
- Views on children – what number you should have or if you should have any at all. How should they be disciplined?
- Finances – how should money be spent and earned.
- Religion – how your beliefs will affect the marriage.
- Politics – are you strong enough to remain together if you have opposing political views.
You might be interested in Legal Things to Do After Getting Married.
6. You are open with them
In addition to being comfortable around your partner, another sign you married the right person is that you can be open with them about your thoughts, secrets, dreams, and goals. You can do this because you know that they not only listen to you but also support you.
The right person to marry is that partner you cannot wait to tell whenever something happens to you, be it good or bad. They are on your mental speed dial as numero uno and get a first-class seat to the events in your life because you are just that comfortable being open and vulnerable around them. This is the right person to marry.
7. The relationship has made you grow positively
Need to know how to marry the right person? Marry that person who inspires you to grow positively. Marriage is a partnership, and the only way a partnership can survive is if it grows.
To find out if this marriage will help you grow, look at yourself when you first got into this relationship and look at yourself today. If you can say without a doubt that you have grown positively, this is a good sign that your marriage will help you grow to even greater heights. It is, of course, essential that this is a two-way street.
8. You are marrying because you choose to
How do you know you’re marrying the right person? You’re marrying them of your own free will. It means that you see in them, something that you like and can work with and so are choosing to commit.
Suppose you find yourself getting married because of societal pressure, pressure from family or your partner, or even emotional blackmail. In that case, you need to take a step back and reevaluate why you have to be pressured to marry this partner.
9. You trust each other
No relationship can survive without trust. It is an important brick in the foundation of marriage and one that, when cracked, can lead to the collapse of the entire structure. You need to be sure that your partner has your back and will support you. That they will not betray you and that they will defend you to the world.
When you marry someone you trust, you are that much confident in yourself. You won’t spend sleepless nights worrying about what they might be up to or their negative thoughts towards you. With such thoughts kept at bay, you will have less anxiety and stress, which can only be good for the marriage.
10. You communicate effectively
As the social creatures that humans are, we cannot survive without communication, and this is very much applicable in marriage. Healthy communication in marriage can go a long way in contributing to its survival because it brings about unity and a greater awareness of solutions to existing problems and any potential ones that might arise.
Signs of healthy communication include:
- A lack of constant criticism.
- You don’t nag each other.
- Conversations flow freely.
- You can discuss issues calmly.
- You listen to understand each other when you speak.
11. Your arguments are healthy
It is highly unlikely that there won’t be arguments in a relationship. Regardless of how compatible you are with someone, there will always be an area where you don’t see eye to eye. In such cases, what matters is not that you clash but rather how you clash.
A healthy argument allows for a peaceful resolution because both of you will be more likely to listen to reason. To avoid having to ask yourself, “did I marry the right person?” in the future, look out for these signs of a healthy argument when you argue:
- No name-calling.
- No bringing up things from the past.
- No threatening a breakup or break.
- No prolonged silent treatment when you don’t get your way.
If these signs are present in your relationship, then chances are that you are marrying the right person.
12. Your friends and family have no objections
When it comes to how to know you are marrying the right person, the opinions of friends and family are pretty important. Why? For the simple reason that they can act as unbiased observers when our eyes are blinded by love.
The majority of your friends and family giving the green light to your partner is a good sign that you are marrying the right person because it means that others see the same qualities that you see.
13. You share common interests and enjoy each other’s company
Spouses who spend time together stay together. This is easier done when you both have common interests you can both engage in. Indeed, most married people rated this as one of the most critical factors needed for a successful marriage.
And for times you don’t have shared interests, having the willingness to engage in the other’s interests can go a long way in maintaining your marital bond. So next time you’re thinking of how you know you’re marrying the right person, look at the common interests you have with your partner and be reassured if they can be counted on more than one hand.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. Why marrying the right person is important?
- It gives you peace of mind.
- You get positive and uplifting companionship.
- You become more successful as they amplify your talents.
- You have access to a great support system.
- Can lead to financial stability.
- You become a better person overall.
Here are more reasons marriage is important at Benefits of Marriage for Men and Women.
2. How do you know the right woman to marry?
- She supports your dreams.
- You can be yourself around her.
- She loves you unconditionally and wants to commit.
- You share common interests.
- You have compatible views on raising children.
- You trust her, and she trusts you.
- You healthily communicate with each other.
3. What makes a man want to marry you?
- You support his dreams.
- You have goals and ambitions of your own.
- You are financially stable or on the way there.
- You show him respect as a human being.
- You healthily argue with him.
- You aren’t critical of the little things.
- He is comfortable around you.
- He shares common interests with you.
You might be interested in Signs He Wants to Marry You in the Future.
All in all
These are but some things to look out for to be sure that you are marrying the right person. Your partner should be able to tick off most of the boxes here for a successful marriage. If this isn’t the case, you should fix these issues before going ahead with the wedding. Whatever you decide, however, consider getting pre-marital counseling as it can be beneficial.
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