11 Signs Husband Is Changing His Mind About Divorce
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Not too long ago, your husband was either bringing up divorce often or was acting like he was ready to leave the marriage at a moment’s notice. Then out of nowhere, he changed and started working towards the stability of the marriage. So now you’re confused because you’re not sure if this is a sign your husband is changing his mind about divorce or something else.
Your confusion is quite understandable. I mean, not too long ago, this man was making you feel frustrated every day when he made it clear that he wanted a divorce. Now, he’s a man with actions that say otherwise, and you’re just not sure what he wants anymore.
Truth is, there’s a very good chance that your husband is changing his mind about divorce. This has been confirmed by studies that showed that many people who wanted to get divorced ended up changing their minds and staying with their partners.
But seeing as many people who wanted to get divorced still went ahead with it anyway, it is important to be sure about your husband’s intentions before you get your hopes high. To help you with that, we will discuss several signs that you can look out for to be sure that your husband is indeed reconsidering divorcing you.
Check out Signs Your Separated Husband Wants You Back.
1. Increased physical contact
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People are more physical with those they love and want to stay with. This is why a sign your husband is changing his mind about divorce is that he starts to initiate more nonsexual physical contact, especially when he cooled off from doing this for a while.
He’ll hold your hands or touch them occasionally, maintain endearing eye contact, touch you more during conversations, and brush up on you when you sit together.
People who want to divorce will try to limit physical contact as much as possible, so if he’s doing the reverse, this is a good sign that he plans to stay.
2. Better communication than before
Communicating with a person who wants a divorce usually goes one of two ways: they either try to argue often or act very cold and unbothered towards their spouse to communicate their lack of interest.
A husband who no longer wants a divorce will ditch those communication methods and communicate with you more like a good husband would. He’d engage in constructive discussions, use a calmer and happier tone, and yell less or show a warmer dispensation. He might even begin to take your opinion into consideration.
Good communication between spouses has been noted to be one of the most important factors in keeping a marriage strong. If he’s communicating more with you, that’s a sign of a marriage getting back on track.
3. Mentions divorce less
Imagine you’re in a country you don’t like, and you’ve finally made plans to leave that country. Wouldn’t you always mention that you are leaving that country whenever things go wrong?
That’s the same with divorce. A man about to leave a marriage will remind you of it whenever there’s an opportunity to do so.
It is, therefore, a good sign that your husband is changing his mind about divorce if he mentions it less often. Of course, there might still be plans to leave, but it means that he’s giving the prospect of staying some serious thought.
And if he stops mentioning divorce completely, you can be all but certain that he has changed his mind about going through with the divorce.
4. Shows interest in your affairs
Unless you have an extremely caring husband, a man who wants to leave a marriage will generally not be interested in the things his spouse does. He won’t ask too many questions about your life, and he wouldn’t even expect answers if he did.
A man who wants to stay, on the other hand, will do the exact opposite. He’ll ask about your work and other things you get up to, including your hobbies and interests. He’ll try to help out around the house where he can and ask you if there are areas where you need assistance.
Being interested in their spouse’s life is something that only a caring and present husband does, so if your husband starts to pay more attention to you, divorce might be leaving his mind.
5. Increased intimacy
Experts say a person who wants a divorce will likely avoid intimacy with their spouse as part of their strategy to dissociate from the marriage.
So if your husband is having second thoughts about divorcing you, a sign that this is the case is that he would become more sexual and intimate with you. He’d make more sexual advances, kiss you often, touch you more intimately, and try to have sex with you.
Will your husband change his mind about divorce if he starts being intimate again? We can’t say for certain. But what we do know is that according to Pew Research center, sex and intimacy are key to a successful marriage. So if he’s being more intimate, it’s a very good sign that he intends to stay married to you.
6. Tries to spend time with you
Spending time with someone you want to divorce makes little sense because your wanting to leave the marriage likely means that you can’t stand the person.
Therefore, a clue that your husband no longer plans to leave is that he makes plans to be with you. He asks you on dates or even for more simple things like going on walks and tagging along for grocery shopping.
Spending time with your spouse is one of the best ways to keep a marriage going, so if your husband intends to stay, he’ll try to be with you more often.
7. Compliments you
A man who wants to leave a marriage has no use complimenting his spouse because if he thought so highly of them, he wouldn’t be trying to leave. That’s like a person tasting a certain dish, complimenting it, and refusing to take any more.
The fact is, only husbands who want to stay in a marriage will complement their spouses. Therefore, it is reasonable to assume that your husband suddenly complimenting you on various fronts when he hasn’t been doing so for a while is likely proof that he plans to stay.
You’ll start hearing about how you’re beautiful, look good in a certain dress, how good your meals taste, and how hard a worker you are. He might even go further to talk about how appreciative he is of you if he has all but decided on staying.
8. Tries to engage in your interests
If you are having marriage problems so much so that your husband wants a divorce, it makes no sense for him to show any interest in the things you do. The man is trying to leave, so he probably won’t be interested in trying out something that will tie him to you.
Therefore, your husband suddenly starting to show interest in your affairs is an indication that he plans to stay. You might see him doing things like helping you out with house chores, going to events you go to or asking you for details on an event you attended.
Absent any sinister affairs, a husband who starts showing interest in his wife is likely doing so because he wants to go back to happier times when you did things together.
9. Delaying divorce proceedings
How can you know that your husband has changed his mind about divorce? Check how much action he has actually taken towards finalizing the divorce.
You don’t just wake up and get divorced, there’s a whole process, and it can be quite complicated. You have to engage a lawyer, talk about the division of assets, and find your own place to make the transition easier.
If your husband hasn’t done any of these things and, in addition, has stopped mentioning divorcing you as much as he used to, he might be trying to buy time to see if the marriage can be saved even if he doesn’t know it.
Be careful if he doesn’t initiate divorce proceedings yet keeps mentioning divorce as it could be a sign of a manipulative man.
10. Expresses positive feelings for you
Statements where your husband expresses positive feelings for you are further proof that he wants to stay because a person on the verge of leaving a marriage will want to sever emotions with their spouse.
He talks about how he misses you and thinks you’re a great person, amongst other things. If he ventures so far as to start saying that he loves you, then you don’t need tips on how to make your husband change his mind about divorce because, honey, he already has.
11. Suggests marriage therapy
What can make your husband change his mind about divorce? One word – therapy. Much like a doctor helps you when you’re sick, a marriage therapist helps a marriage when things aren’t going too well.
Your husband suggesting that you go for marriage therapy is probably the most obvious sign that he has changed his mind about divorce because it indicates that he wants to work on the marriage.
If you’ve already tried therapy before and it didn’t work, him suggesting it again is proof that not only does he want to work on the marriage, he wants to fight for it.
Check out How to Save Your Marriage When Your Husband Wants a Divorce.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I know if my husband wants to save your marriage?
Some things that your husband might do to show that he wants to save your marriage include:
- Increasing how often he touches you and engages in nonsexual physical contact.
- Trying to be more intimate with you.
- Showing interest in your hobbies and activities.
- Complimenting you on your appearance and character.
- Suggesting that you go for marriage therapy.
- Increasing the amount of time spent with you.
Is he having second thoughts about divorce?
Some ways to know if he’s having second thoughts about divorcing you are:
- He mentions divorces less.
- He tries to spend time with you.
- He delays divorce proceedings.
- He communicates with you more and in an endearing way.
- He shows more interest in you and the things you get up to.
- He touches you more.
- He tries to be more intimate with you.
How do you know when your marriage is really over?
When your marriage has exhibited several signs that a divorce is coming and you’ve tried everything to prevent it, yet things aren’t improving, it might be time to call it quits. You can know for sure that your marriage is really over if you go for therapy and things still don’t change.
All in all…
Human feelings are a complicated thing that can lead a person to ask for a divorce in one moment and change their mind the next. If your husband is one of them, you can be sure of it by looking at some of the points discussed above.
However, before you take him back, you need to think about whether it would be the best choice for you. Do this by checking if his reasons for wanting to divorce you can be dealt with as time goes on. You don’t want to be in such a heart-wrenching situation again.
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