Signs of an Untrustworthy Person - 17 Reasons Not to Trust Someone

And while gossiping is traditionally associated with women and is one of the chief reasons why people say women are untrustworthy, the truth is that anyone can gossip so do be careful to observe this behavior in people you keep around.

10. They have constant mood swings

A person with constant mood swings is more likely to be unreliable because their reliability will change according to their mood.

You might for instance, be trusting them to get a project done but because their mood suddenly changed, they would be unable to meet up with the deadline because they simply did not feel like it.

A person with constant mood swings would also be easy to annoy or manipulate and when in either of those states, they could easily betray your trust.

11. They are manipulative

Look at interactions you’ve had with the person in question and check to see if they have tried or have been successful in manipulating you into doing things that they wanted as opposed to what you wanted.

For instance, they insinuated that you were a coward or kept pestering you until you did the thing.

Such people cannot be trusted because in influencing you to go against your values, they are influencing you to betray yourself

Also be careful if you observe them doing this to other people.

12. They disregard your boundaries

The boundaries you set in any relationship are an extension of who you are and what you value. Our boundaries tell others what they can or cannot do around us or with things related to us.

If you find that a person is unable to respect these boundaries, it is a strong sign that they are not to be trusted because a betrayal of those boundaries is a de facto betrayal of you because they are going against things that you hold dear.

13. They break promises regularly

If looking for who to trust, avoid people who constantly break promises they make to you regardless of how small the promises are.

Trusting someone means that you believe that they will fulfill their promises and if this is not the case, then that person cannot by extension, be trusted.

14. They don’t keep your secrets

One of the major signs of an untrustworthy person is that they are unable to keep your secrets. Trust entails that whatever you tell someone in confidence should be kept confidential.

A person who tells other people these secrets is indirectly telling you that you should not have trusted them enough to tell them anything in confidence.

As with the case of people who gossip to you, watch out for people who pass the secrets of others to you because this is also a sign that they tell others your secrets as well.

15. They use your secrets against you

As mentioned earlier, an untrustworthy person would want to stockpile on your secrets for the purposes of controlling you.

They can do this in several ways including blackmail or as a way to guilt trip you.

For those closer to you, they might pass this off as a joke or something casual by for instance saying things like, “remember how I kept it a secret that you did so so?” in order to get you to do something for them. Not only would they be betraying your trust, they would also be manipulating you.

In order to avoid situations like that, stop trusting such people enough to tell them secrets that you do not want to be found out.

16. They are selfish and egocentric

When trying to find out how to tell if someone is trustworthy, multiple studies say to look to see if they are selfish and egocentric.

A selfish person will have no qualms about betraying you because their primary concern is themselves and if throwing you under any bus would help further their goals and ambitions, they will do so.

Pick up on signs that a person is selfish from characteristics of a selfish husband.

17. Your gut doesn’t trust them

Your gut will often recognize an untrustworthy face before you do so if you feel as though you cannot trust someone even without concrete proof, don’t take this feeling for granted.

You should not of course write a person off simply because of a gut feeling but you should use it as a starting point. If your gut tells you that you cannot trust someone, look for reasons why this is the case by looking for the other signs above in the person.

This will then give you further insight as to whether you were right not to inherently trust the person.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. How can you tell if someone is untrustworthy?

• They lie about little things
• They never take blame for their actions
• They are manipulative
• They like to gossip about other people
• They are selfish
• Their mood can change easily

2. How can you tell if someone is shady?

• They are very secretive
• They are uncomfortable when you ask simple or personal questions
• They are overly nice
• They constantly lie – especially over little things
• They are manipulative
• Their social circle is always changing

3. How do you deal with an untrustworthy person?

• Acknowledge that you cannot trust the person

The first thing you need to do is to tell yourself that you cannot trust the person in question as well as why you cannot trust the person. This way you can be sure that they are indeed untrustworthy.

• Remind yourself the ways their untrustworthiness can affect you

You need to then convince yourself of why you need to deal with this untrustworthiness by coming up with possible effects of relating with such a person. You can also remind yourself of past instances where their untrustworthiness hurt you.

• Decide whether it would be beneficial to cut the person out of your life entirely or whether to still relate with them but on a reduced level

You should then make a decision between cutting the person out of your life or leaving them in it.

You might be unable to cut them out of your life because they are in it in such a way that you cannot get rid of them completely, such as family or co-workers. In such a scenario, it would be best to simply reduce your interactions with them.

Conclusion

These signs will help you notice untrustworthy people but can you yourself be trusted? You might think that you can and that might very well be true but people have a tendency to betray others without even knowing it.

So, as much as you can use these signs to find out if others are worthy of trust, you should also use these signs to as well do some self introspection so that you do not come across as untrustworthy to others.