- It isn’t always easy knowing when your boyfriend doesn’t love you anymore. Sometimes it is easier to go on believing that he is still in love with you and that you are misunderstanding the issues you are having in your relationship.
- Hopefully, after reading this article you will know for sure if all the signs you’ve been getting from him are definite signs your boyfriend doesn’t love you anymore.
- It is not worth your peace and self-esteem staying in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love you in return. We also tell you what the best way forward for you is when it is clear a man no longer loves you.
Loving someone who isn’t in love with you anymore and doesn’t want to be with you anymore can be heart-breaking and devastating. It can make you begin to doubt and question yourself. It can also affect your confidence and self-esteem sometimes.
You don’t need to go through all the hurt and pain that comes with not knowing what the problem is in your relationship and constantly being plagued with the nagging question of whether your man no longer loves you. This article will show you the 27 heartbreaking signs your boyfriend doesn’t love you anymore. And importantly, what you should do in such a situation.
What Does It Mean When He Stops Loving You?
When we enter relationships, we often entertain these grand notions that the relationship will last forever and that the feeling of love will last forever. This may be true for most people and their relationships. But the other side of reality is that this is not always the case for everyone. For most or some relationships, a time comes when one or both of the partners drift apart, and that feeling of love and being in love dies or fizzles out.
And so when your boyfriend stops loving you, it is important to understand that this had nothing to do with you. It is difficult to try and unravel and understand why your boyfriend fell out of love with you. It could be that you were both incompatible or that he met someone else or he wants to continue his journey without you in it.
Whatever the reason might be, you must understand and tell yourself that his feeling that way is not your fault or on you and has nothing to do with you. When he stops loving you, it simply means he doesn’t want to continue the journey of love with you and that’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. Another great guy will come along and before you know it, you’re in love again with someone who loves you back.
How To Tell He Doesn’t Love You Anymore – 27 Heartbreaking Signs He’s No Longer In Love With You And Doesn’t Want To Be With You Anymore.
There’s no need to lose any more sleep wondering if he’s no longer in love with you. Look out for any of these 27 signs, and when you see some or all of them then you have your answer.
1. He stops trying or making sacrifices for the relationship to work.
Relationships are all about making sacrifices so that the relationship can work. At least 32% of some Americans surveyed in 2019 in a survey found on Statista agree that when they are in love, they will make substantial sacrifices for their love just to make it work.
Sacrifices Americans would make for their love, in 2019. Source: Statista
Unless your boyfriend has always been part of the 23% shown in the above chart in not making any sacrifices in the relationship (which is still problematic), then you will not read too much into this sign.
But, you still ask yourself if it is worth it staying with someone who does not want to make any sacrifices in the relationship and wants to remain selfish. That is certainly not the quality or characteristic of a good boyfriend.
2. Romance takes a back seat.
Every relationship needs romance to stay alive. Without romance and passion, a boyfriend and girlfriend are only as good as friends and might as well start calling themselves just friends and not lovers. And we are not alone in this thinking. At least 40% of some Americans surveyed in 2019 in a survey assessed on Statista agree that it remains vital even as a relationship progresses.
Importance of romance in a relationship in the United States in 2019. Source: Statista
When we are in love with someone, we always want to show it romantically. If your boyfriend who has always been romantic and passionate in your relationship suddenly starts losing interest in romance and passion in the relationship, it is a tell-tale sign that he is starting to fall out of love.
3. You don’t spend as much time talking together as you used to.
Before now you could spend hours on end talking about everything and anything. Now all of a sudden he seems “too busy” to even hang out with you and talk like old times. And this could be because he may be starting to fall out of love with you.
4. He can’t wait to get away from you.
If it always seems like he’s always in a hurry to get away from you and can even when what you’re talking about is something that he used to be passionate about discussing with you, it’s a sign he’s trying to create a gulf and distance between the two of you because he is no longer in love with you.
5. He is emotionally distant.
He becomes emotionally distant in the following ways:
- He stops confiding in you as he used to do. And it makes you wonder who else he is confiding in. Chances are he may be confiding in someone else who may be another woman.
- When he’s there with you it almost feels like only his body is there but his mind isn’t there with you. He pretends he is listening to you but you can tell that in reality, he is not there with you. It can be infuriating and annoying to any girlfriend when her boyfriend does this.
- When you spend time together it feels too forced and mechanical, like there’s no life to it. You almost start feeling like a stranger around him.
6. He finds fault too easily with everything you do and is always critical of you.
If he’s suddenly always on a short fuse with you and trying to find fault and criticize everything you do, he’s trying to make you feel small. This can also easily degenerate into an abusive and toxic relationship when he starts to behave in this way towards you. It is important to nip it in the bud as soon as you see this sign. Make it clear that you do not appreciate and will not stand for it.
7. It’s like he’s always looking for an excuse to pick a fight with you.
Even when you have done nothing wrong, because he is always trying to find fault and criticize you, you almost always end up fighting. He is hoping that by constantly bickering and fighting with you, you will get the message that he is no longer in love with you, and walk away.
8. It’s like he’s always out to hurt you deeply with his words when you fight, which is almost all the time.
Fights are a normal part of any relationship, but when couples who are in love fight they don’t set out to hurt each other with their words. And even after fighting, they can’t wait to make up and restore the lost harmony.
But when a man doesn’t love you anymore, he may resort to saying very hurtful things to you just to hurt you badly, and he has no interest in making things right or restoring harmony. If anything, he will still find a way or ways to blame you and make it your fault.
This is narcissistic and toxic behavior that will only harm you in the long run. It is best to walk away when he starts acting like this towards you.
9. He’s always “busy” to spend quality time with you.
Without couples spending quality time together, they will grow apart. And this is what he is hoping will happen by not spending quality time with you. When a man loves you, it does not matter how “busy” he may be, he will always make out time to spend with you. If his work or schedule is more important than spending time with you, you don’t need any other handwriting on the wall that he has fallen out of love with you.
10. Intimacy in the relationship is also on the rocks.
Unless your relationship has been one based on celibacy from the onset, if he is always coming up with excuses not to be intimate with you or have sex with you, he is no longer in love with you.
Sex and intimacy are usually ways we seek to express our love for one another, and a man who loves you very much won’t be able to keep his hands to himself when he’s around you. If your boyfriend is the opposite and always wants to keep his hands to himself, he is no longer in love with you.
11. He excludes you from decision-making even though it used to be a joint effort in the past.
This is another way he starts to disconnect from you to show you that you are no longer an important part of his life.
12. He’s rude and disrespectful.
Where your boyfriend suddenly becomes rude and disrespectful to you and does not even care about how his words affect you, waste no time in that relationship. Leave him. No one has the right to treat you rudely and disrespectfully, even if you are dating them.
Why not also read our article on What to do when people don’t respect you for more tips on what to do when he is rude and disrespectful.
13. He does not respect your boundaries and the things that matter to you anymore.
When someone loves you, they will not go out of their way to do the things you have made clear to them you don’t like. They respect those boundaries because they love you. But when your boyfriend suddenly has no qualms about going against your expressed desires and wishes and crossing boundaries you have made clear should not be crossed, you can be sure that the love is gone.
For some, they will go as far as cheating on you with no remorse whatsoever. You should also not stand for such disrespect and affront to your person and your dignity. Walk away while you still can.
Related article: What to say to someone who cheated on you.
14. He is demeaning and condescending both in private and in public.
This is another mean and toxic tactic to make you feel small and eat away at your self-confidence. This is another behavior you should not allow or give a second to because if you allow it, your self-esteem and self-worth will take a serious hit that will take some time to recover from.
15. He does not apologize even when he is clearly in the wrong.
In a normal relationship where the boyfriend loves his girlfriend, he will apologize when he is wrong. This is healthy and important for the health of the relationship. But if he cannot do this anymore, it is a clear sign that he is no longer in love with you and does not care how you feel about his failure to apologize. To know what to do in such a situation, check out our helpful article on What to do when someone won’t apologize.
16. Lying to you has become a new normal.
If he suddenly has no issues lying to you and does it so brazenly, he is indirectly communicating to you that he no longer loves you. And our article on What to do when your boyfriend lies to your face helps you with what to do when this happens.
17. He makes mean jokes at your expense.
Making fun of each other and pranking each other in a good way is also another healthy component of a loving relationship. But where the jokes degenerate to mean underhand comments and hurtful remarks it is no longer love.
Call him out when he does this and tell him that you don’t appreciate it. If he continues with it, consider walking away because those mean comments can start to affect your self-esteem without you realizing it.
18. He suddenly becomes super secretive and cagey.
If you find that you now have to pry out even the smallest bit of information from your boyfriend and he is always cagey and on the defensive, he is hiding something. And importantly he no longer considers you an important part of his life to share any information about his life with you.
19. He stops doing those nice and special things he used to do for you before.
Maybe before he used to surprise you with gifts for no reason or make you feel special on your birthday and every other day. But all of a sudden he stops doing all of that. It is not a coincidence or in your head. He has decided that he no longer wants to invest in you anymore because he no longer loves you.
Related article: How to surprise my boyfriend for no reason.
20. He starts comparing you to other women.
And in some really bad instances, he may even begin to bring up his exes indirectly in conversations. He may not come out to say it clearly in so many words but you can read between the lines that he is comparing you to them and implying that you should be like them.
This is not acceptable under any circumstance and where this happens, it is important to call him out on it immediately and make it clear that you do not appreciate what he is trying to do in comparing you with them.
Check out this important related article on 21 Worrying signs he misses his ex wife and what you should do in such an instance.
21. You are no longer a priority.
A guy who loves you will move mountains for you. When you call on him to come and help you, he will not think twice about it or give you excuses. He will do it right away because you are important to him and he wants to be your hero and show you that you are a priority to him. But if your boyfriend becomes the exact opposite and always seems “too busy” to help you or spend time with you, he is definitely no longer in love with you.
22. He doesn’t seem to get jealous anymore or mind if you have a close association with a guy.
Jealousy is one of those things a guy would exhibit when he loves a woman. And it doesn’t have to be the unhealthy jealousy where he hurts anyone that comes close to you. But just that reaction of being territorial when he can sense that another guy is trying to take your attention away from him. But if he doesn’t show this anymore and even seems not to mind when you flirt with other guys, this is his way of telling you that he doesn’t feel the same way about you anymore.
Related article: How to not be a jealous girlfriend.
23. He stops taking any interest in your life and what goes on in it.
It will start to feel like you could disappear and your boyfriend couldn’t be bothered. He no longer wants to know what’s going on in your life or if you’re okay. Once you see this sign, know that he has disconnected from you and is no longer in love with you.
24. He brings up hurtful things from your past to hurt you.
This is not only mean and nasty, it is also disrespectful and just not right. It will hurt anyone because what he is effectively doing is weaponizing the information you disclosed to him in confidence and as part of being vulnerable and open in a relationship. He knows that by saying these things he will hurt you, but he doesn’t seem to care anymore and that is because his feelings of love for you have waned.
25. He hardly compliments you anymore or flirts with you anymore.
One of the things every girlfriend wants to hear from her boyfriend is compliments. And guys know that giving their girlfriends compliments is one sure way to make her smile. Flirting is also important in keeping the fire of love in a relationship. If he stops giving you two of these things, watch out. He may no longer be in love with you.
26. He seldom uses the “L” word anymore.
At first, you may not notice this, but if you start to pay close attention you may realize this happens in one of two ways (or both ways). It is either when you tell him you love him, he will not say it back or may hesitate in saying it back to you. Or, he stops saying it entirely, and the only time it may surface is when you have to say it.
His failing to say it is no accident, but very deliberate. It is another one of the ways he wants to show you that he doesn’t love you anymore.
27. He asks for a break from the relationship.
This is usually the final straw. A boyfriend who is still in love in a relationship will hardly want a break from it. And if you are not sure of what to do when he requests for a break from the relationship, be sure to read our article on What to do if your boyfriend wants a break. It helps with practical tips on how to handle the situation.
What To Do When He No Longer Loves You.
In an ideal world, the best way out of a situation like this is for the man to come out and be clear about how he feels and maybe indicate that he wants the relationship to come to an end. But this isn’t always the reality. In reality, most guys act cowardly, and would much rather display all or some of the 27 signs listed in the earlier section, in hopes that you will make it easy for them and do what they are too weak and afraid to do, which is to walk away.
And so, the best thing to do for yourself when it is clear to you from the above signs that you love someone and they don’t love you anymore is to walk away from the relationship.
Cut your losses and move away from it because the longer you stay in a loveless relationship, the more harm you do to yourself. And before long, the strain will cause substantial harm and damage that will take some time to heal.
It will not be easy at first, but with time you will be fine and ready to find love again. To help you navigate an enjoyable life post-relationship breakup, why not read our articles on What to do after a breakup with a boyfriend, Things to do when single and alone, and How to stay single and be happy to help you on that journey.
You may like this related article on 5 Things to say to an ex boyfriend you still love.
Frequently Asked Questions.
- My boyfriend does not love me anymore, what do I do?
There’s nothing else you can do except to leave the relationship. Staying in it won’t change how he feels about you and you cannot force him to love you if he doesn’t love you anymore. And that is why the best thing you can do for yourself is to love yourself enough to leave the relationship because staying on will pretty much be like flogging a dead horse.
- I feel like my boyfriend doesn’t love me, how can I know for sure?
If he displays some or all of the 27 signs listed in this article then you can be sure that he doesn’t love you anymore.
- I love him but he doesn’t love me, what should I do?
There is no need to waste your love on someone who doesn’t love you back. Leave him and reserve your love for someone deserving of it. And that is someone who will reciprocate it in the same measure.
- Why doesn’t my boyfriend text me?
It is difficult to pinpoint the specific reason why he doesn’t text you but the chief reason could be that it is because he is no longer in love with you.
- Why does my boyfriend not love me?
Sadly, only your boyfriend knows why he doesn’t love you anymore. There could be several reasons why but to avoid speculating on it, it may be best to ask him directly about it.
- How to know if my boyfriend still loves me?
If your boyfriend still loves you, he will exhibit the opposite of all the 27 signs listed in this article. He will be the sweetest and most loving boyfriend you can ever imagine. To find out about more traits of a boyfriend who loves you, also be sure to read our article on Things a good boyfriend does, which is dedicated to discussing it.
You are worth being loved and being in a relationship with a man that loves you back. Staying in a loveless relationship will only hurt you in the long run. You are better off being single than staying in a relationship where you are the only one in love.
Once you see some or all of the 27 signs listed in this article, accept that the relationship has run its course and come to an end and love yourself enough to leave it. And in good time you will meet another loving prince charming who will love you back in the same way you love him.
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