Things To Do On A First Date With A Girl
WhatToGetMy Instructional Article
- Women love to feel special on their first date. Anything that would make them feel very comfortable and special will have them coming back for more dates with you.
- Ask yourself why you asked her out and what you want from the first date to know exactly how to plan the first date.
- Pay attention to 4 details – budget, location, activities, and appearance – in planning your first date. Read on for more details.
- Find out the 11 Impressionable Things To Do On A First Date With A Girl and what to do after the first date.
So you’ve met the woman (or girl) of your dreams and eventually got her to start liking you or at least thinking of you as first date material. Even better than meeting her and getting her to like you, you’ve asked her out on a first date with you. You are hoping that this first date would not just be a once-off thing and would most likely be the start of something serious or more long-term with her. Now you are on your wit’s end trying to plan this first date so that it goes very well and makes an unforgettable impression with this very attractive woman. You’re even entertaining a faint hope that she would fall in love with you after this first date so that in a year you’re having a first date anniversary where you will be laughing about all the good and bad of this first date.
A first date is usually the make or break for any budding romantic relationship. The first date is what usually determines if there will be a second (and hopefully subsequent) date. So we understand your nervousness in wanting to make it a resounding success. Rest assured that after reading this article, you will have her wanting to go on a second date and hopefully several other dates with you.
WHAT DO WOMEN (GIRLS) WANT OUT OF A FIRST DATE?
This is the first place to start. You after all want to know what a woman is thinking when she hears “can we go out”, as this would help you in terms of your plans to give her an impressionable and unforgettable first date.
It may surprise you that what a woman wants from a first date is very simple and straightforward. Wait for it…They just want to feel good and special on and after a first date. They want to leave that date feeling like “wow that guy actually saw me for who I am and appreciated it very much. And we are not even making this up. According to a 2017 survey of a selection of women in America, some of the top things that women considered make a first date great is a guy who compliments them and gives them extra attention and doting. See for yourself in this chart.
What makes a first date a great first date according to American women in 2017 (Source: PR Newswire)
Simple as this sounds though, it is easier said than done. But not to worry, that is what we are here for. We unpack for you those things to do on a first date with a girl to make her feel special and cared for and importantly looking forward to another date with you.
SOME IMPORTANT QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF AND ANSWER BEFORE EMBARKING ON THE DATE.
Now that you know what she wants out of that date, you have some preliminary groundwork to do before going on that date so that it has the lasting impact you want.
1. Why did I ask her out?
This question is important because it determines or should determine how much thought and effort should go into this first date. If you asked her out just to hang out as friends to see where things may go without hoping so much for a romantic encounter just yet, then this would affect the venue you choose for the date and the mood and atmosphere you set on the date. If your intentions are not to get so serious as yet but just hang out as friends, you would be sending her the wrong message that you are hoping for something serious right away, if you go all out and make elaborate and fancy first date arrangements.
It’s important that you ask yourself this question and know the answer to it before you start planning this date because sometimes guys don’t think this through and then create false hope and high expectations that they had no intentions of following through on or were not sure they would be able to follow through on. And then what this does is make the girl feel like you played her and in turn label you as a jerk, especially if you then ghost her after this elaborate first date.
If you asked her out because you want to get intimate with her right away, then again this would influence the choice of venue, the effort you put in, and the tone and language you adopt – whether very sensual (sexual) or more cautious. In short, it is important
2. What do I want out of this first date?
This is the next important question because it would determine the tone and language you adopt during your date with her. So for instance, if you are hoping that you get lucky and have sex with her on the first date you would need to set the tone for that. Although we must warn that having sex on a first date is highly risque treading and is discouraged especially if you are looking for something more long term. If you’re after a one night stand then it wouldn’t matter. But if she means something more than a one night stand to you, then you need to tell yourself this so that it psyches you up to give only the best to this first date.
3. What is the extent of rapport/connection between us?
This question goes more to helping you pick out a suitable venue and structuring how your conversation should flow. This question is simply to assess the extent of your interaction with the lady in question before you had asked her out. Were you both friends before you asked her out or did you just walk up to her as a total stranger and asked her out? In the case of the former, your friend, you guys are already cool and have a good rapport and so picking a venue and having an easy conversation would not be too difficult. In the latter case where you are still both strangers and therefore have no rapport, you will need to put more thought into the venue and the conversation structure. We will discuss the venue in the next section when we discuss planning the date.
4. What impression of me do I want her having after this date?
This final question is critical. Do you want her leaving the date feeling like you are the worst jerk she’s ever met? Or would you much rather she saw you as the finest gentleman she’s ever met. Answering this question would determine how you act throughout the date and how you treat her. If you couldn’t be bothered about how she’d feel about you after the date, chances are you won’t pay any attention to the details we are about to show you that you need to pay attention to.
PLANNING AND PREPARING FOR THE FIRST DATE.
Now that you know what a woman wants from a first date, and you have answered the important preliminary questions, you will need to plan and prepare for this date since you are hoping to get a second date after this one. Winging it won’t work. Four (4) important details have to be considered and catered for to make the first date impressionable.
1. Your Budget.
This is very important because while you want to give her an impressionable first date, you also don’t want to find yourself broke and financially stranded after the date. That would also not be very responsible on your part.
You, therefore, need to establish from the outset how much you can part with moneywise, on the first date. This would also inform the type of venue you choose. This is because chances are that the woman you are going on the date with is likely to fall into the 91% of women in the chart above who wants the man to pick up the bill on a first date. If you don’t have $1,000 to part with, it would be very irresponsible to go to a restaurant that would cost that much in the hopes that she would agree to split the bill with you. You can be sure that she won’t waste her time on a second date if she feels like you exerted unwanted influence in getting her to pay a bill she never planned on paying for.
Always remember that women actually value the experience and feeling they get from you on the date, rather than the venue and how lavish or pretty it may have been. There is therefore no point in trying to impress with a venue you can’t afford and lose the chance of another date with her when you can just be yourself in a venue you can afford and give her the time of her life.
2. The Location.
This is another important detail not to take for granted. Once you’ve determined your budget, you need to then choose a venue or activities that fall within your budget. And the key is to choose a relaxed and somewhat familiar environment that would make you both feel comfortable. Women want to feel comfortable and relaxed on a first date and this is confirmed by a 2017 Survey of a selection of American women according to this chart.
How women want to feel on a first date according to American women in 2017 (Source: PR Newswire)
Good first date locations that are comfortable and relaxing do not have to break your bank at all. Different women have different preferences and according to another survey of American women in 2018, 55.1% of American women would love for their first date to be a sit-down meal at a nice and quiet restaurant that isn’t too noisy.
First date locations that eventually led to marriage (U.S. 2018) Source: Bustle
These women went on to say that this first date of a sit-down meal ultimately led to their continuing a long-term relationship with their partner that eventually ended up in marriage. It is therefore worth paying attention to. And there are several reasons why a sit-down meal at a nice and quiet restaurant is almost always a winner for a first date:
It gives you a chance to build a connection and rapport with the dame.
Sitting across each other and keeping eye contact while having a relaxing conversation that is going very well is a quicker way to build chemistry than going to a movie for instance where you would hardly get a chance to know her.
It gives you a chance to get to learn more about her.
If you are hoping for a second date and something more long term, you also want to be sure that this is the woman you want to settle down with. And what better way than at a nice relaxed meal where it’s just the two of you talking and getting to know yourselves.
It gives you a chance to impress her.
An intimate meal where it’s just the two of you gives you the perfect option to impress her with your wits and charm. How else would she know that you have a great sense of humor if you don’t have her alone to yourself to talk and make her laugh so hard. If you fancy yourself handsome and dashing, a meal together within close range is the perfect time for her to see you and notice that naughty glint in your eyes or that to die for smirk or laughter that would make her go weak at the knees. That sit-down meal is your chance to show off your best assets, impress her, and have her coming back for more of your charm through subsequent dates.
Remember the key is to choose a restaurant that is within your budget and is quiet and intimate. You don’t want to choose a noisy restaurant where you can barely get a quiet and private moment for yourselves.
Also, be wary of choosing uneventful restaurants that have no appeal or allure. There would be that affordable and quiet and intimate diner or restaurant around you that not many people go to. Consider taking her there instead of, say a place like Burger King or McDonald’s.
This is the next important detail to iron out in advance. If you’ve chosen to have the date in the afternoon or at night, you need to prepare and know in advance how you want the whole affair to play out. You can’t leave it to chance because if you go unprepared she will know and you can be sure that she would not take you seriously enough to want a second date.
With the activities, you want to pick activities that would allow you to get to know her better, that would allow for you two to establish a rapport and connection and get the chemistry going early on. You also want activities that give you a chance to charm her by always making her smile. For some reason, women love men that make them laugh and smile a lot. This is not however surprising given that laughter as they say, is the best medicine for the soul. Your activities should strike the perfect balance between allowing you both to talk but still have so much fun that she wants to have a second date with you. There is no set in stone activities. Some fun and yet engaging first date activities include going bowling; taking a romantic walk; going for a musical concert; going ice-skating; visiting the museum or visiting an amusement park.
If your date is on valentine’s day, you can read our article on What To Do On Valentines Day With Your Girlfriend to get really good ideas on what type of activities you can do with her on that Valentine’s day.
4. Your Appearance.
And last, but not least on the detail to plan for is your appearance. How you look on the day matters. While you don’t need to look like one of those hot male models right out of a fashion runway, you must look smart and presentable enough to get her attention. In the same way that men are drawn to a woman’s physical features is the same way women are drawn to men who dress well and neatly. Before a man even speaks, what gets a woman to even acknowledge his presence is the way he presents himself and the aura of confidence that comes with that presentation.
If you need to buy a pair of smart loafers and smart casual outfit that won’t break your account, by all means, do this because your second date depends on it. Try not to overdress for your first date because overdressing sends the message that you are trying too hard, and this will in turn affect your general confidence. Dress in very comfortable and relaxed clothing. Relaxed and comfortable clothing also has a way of rubbing off positively on one’s confidence and general feel-good energies. And you will need these two ingredients when you sit across the table from her.
EXECUTING THE FIRST DATE TO PERFECTION – 11 IMPRESSIONABLE THINGS TO DO ON A FIRST DATE WITH A GIRL.
You’ve asked yourself the important questions and thought through all the important details such as your budget, the location, and your appearance. The d-day has arrived and you are ready to blow her away. Here are guaranteed ways to blow her away. This list of impressionable things to do on a first date with a girl is sure to have her think of a second date with you even before the date is over. And we are not alone, a good number of women in 2017 agree, according to this chart.
What is appropriate on an official first date according to Americans in 2017 (Source: PR Newswire)
1. Keep communication lines open even before the date takes place.
This presupposes that when you asked her out, you got her number. If you don’t have her number, find a way to get it from her. The best form of communication would be to call her. But be sure not to do this every day as it would turn her off because she would feel smoldered by it.
You can call her at least once before the actual date. Keep it simple – just say hello and tell her you thought to check up on her and see she had a good day and then end the call after she’s said she had a good day. You don’t want to come on too strong before the actual date. If you fear that you may go overboard, then it’s best to simply send a short text the day before your date saying that you look forward to seeing her the next day.
Keeping the communication line open just before the date especially when you are still trying to establish a rapport would help in easing any initial awkwardness when you eventually meet up for your date.
2. Where your choice of location is a restaurant, visit the restaurant in advance to know what their menu is and what you can afford so that you are prepared financially and otherwise.
If the restaurant is fairly new and you’re both trying it out, she may want to get a suggestion from you on what the best meal to have is. To avoid looking clueless you can sample a meal in that restaurant beforehand so that you are prepared. And what this would guarantee is that when you both then go on the date you don’t spend so much time on the menu trying to decide what to eat, but rather use that time to kick off the conversation. Plus you come across as a man who knows exactly what he wants if you tell the waiter without looking too hard at the menu what you’re having. That confidence impresses women and she may end up having the same thing you’re having if she’s unable to make a choice.
Remember to keep the restaurant thing simple and avoid the temptation of being too elaborate too soon. It is not advisable to go big and elaborate on a first date because you may achieve the exact opposite effect of making her feel uncomfortable and scaring her off. Women don’t like to feel pressure on a first date.
3. Advance research for movies.
If you decide to go for movies as your first date option, be sure to go in advance to know exactly what the movies that would be showing are and do a little research on the synopsis of the movie so that when you both get to the cinema and she’s unsure what to watch you can waltz in like a movie connoisseur and save the day. She’ll be impressed by your breadth of knowledge about the movies.
Your date should not however end with just the movies because the movies do not give you an opportunity to get to know her or interact with her. It also does not allow her to get to know you better. It is therefore advisable that you try and do something else either before or after the movies. You could decide to take a romantic walk before the movies or go to a bowling alley after the movies.
Whichever you decide to go with, ensure you have an activity in addition to the movie where you get to sit and talk with her. If you find that you cannot do both, then it is best to scrap the movie for a subsequent date and go with the activity that lets you get to know her better.
4. Find out from her if she would be comfortable with you picking her up from her house.
The reason why you need to ask her about this is because some women prefer to bring themselves to the date venue and then maybe have the guy take care of them getting home afterward.
If she is open to you coming to pick her from her house, then be sure to arrive early to pick her up and walk up to her front door to get her. This is important especially if you have a car and would be driving to her place. Do not make the mistake of sitting in your car and calling or texting her to come out. That would be a bad way to start the date because you can be sure that she would not appreciate it.
5. Arrive early if she says she will meet you at the restaurant.
This is very important because nothing turns a woman off on the first date like having to wait for her date to show up.
6. Buy a bouquet.
Whether you are going to pick her from her place or going to wait for her at the restaurant, it would set the tone right if you have a fresh bouquet ready for when you both meet. Flowers have a way of softening and warming a woman’s heart. Roses or lilies are always a safe option to go with for flowers.
Confidence is very important. Nothing turns a girl off like a guy who is unsure of himself. Bring your A-game to bear when it comes to your confidence. Speak with confidence. Carry yourself with confidence and pride.
8. Give her a warm hug and compliment her appearance.
This should be the first thing you do as soon as you meet/see her. This would relax any tension between the both of you and also make her smile even before the date has kicked off. The hug should not be too squishy or suggestive, as you also don’t want her feeling uncomfortable. Maintain a reasonable distance with the hug and make the compliment natural.
9. Get to know her by asking her about herself.
After you’ve both settled in at your date location, get the conversation going. Get to know her better by finding out more about her hobbies and interests. The conversation should be light and not heavy at all. Try to stay away from controversial and emotionally charged topics and also steer away from unloading all your negative life experiences. Any of these would bring about tension and uneasiness to the atmosphere and which would be a sure way to kill any second dates.
10. Be a perfect gentleman even to the waiters who would be attending to you at the restaurant.
If you decide to be a complete jerk to the waiter(s) or waitresses, you can be sure that she will take note of that and write off any thoughts of a second date with you that she may have entertained.
11. End the date on a high.
What counts as a good way to end the first date at the end of the day depends on the woman you go out with. If you’re lucky and she falls within the 64% that don’t mind sharing a kiss after a first date, that would be your high end to the date.
Usually, you can be able to read her body language to know if she is open to sharing a kiss with you when you walk her to the front of her door or a cab or her car. If she gives you that opportunity, be sure to take it because it is a very positive clue that things could get more serious between the both of you.
If she is in the 50% that wants just a kiss on her cheek then give her that and don’t push for more or she’ll be turned off and never want to see you again.
WHAT YOU SHOULD NOT DO ON A FIRST DATE IF YOU HOPE TO GET A YES FOR A SECOND DATE.
What would you find inappropriate first date behavior? According to American women in 2017 (Source: PR Newswire)
According to the above 2017 study, American women listed the following as things that would turn them off from a guy and certainly shut the door to that second date.
1. Using your cellphone during the date.
This one is the biggest turn-off for women. Nothing infuriates a woman on a first date like the guy being on his phone. It tells her that she is not important nor is the date important and that the phone somehow has high priority. It is also rather disrespectful to be using your phone while someone is trying to have a meaningful conversation with you. It would be better not to embark on the date at all than to be on the date and use your cellphone. She will write you off as a selfish jerk and you should not be surprised if she refuses to take your calls thereafter.
2. Taking three (3) drinks too many.
According to that survey, women get turned off if a guy takes more than 2 bottles of drinks on a first date. It creates the impression that you may be an alcoholic and are unable to control your impulses with the bottle. That’s one impression you certainly do not want to create.
3. Arriving late.
This is another serious turn-off for women. It tells her that you have no respect and value for her time.
4. Being rude to the waiting staff.
What this tells her is that you have no respect for other people. If you cannot respect other people, she has no guarantee that you would respect her. And that is why this is another serious turn-off for women.
5. Asking her to have a bite of her food/drink.
This would be romantic if you are both already dating and have established serious chemistry. Otherwise, it comes across as rude and uncultured on a first date.
GETTING THE SECOND DATE – WHAT TO DO AFTER THE FIRST DATE GOES WELL.
You successfully executed the first date and it went well, or at least so you think. Now you want to get her to hang out with you again on a second date. To make that happen, call her the next day after your date. This tells her that you are thinking about her.
Build up the chemistry and keep communicating with her. If you shared a kiss with her after the first date, this would not be too hard. If you weren’t that lucky you need to build up the chemistry by looking for a chance to talk with her. The talking points from your first date would make for good conversation starters. It would also tell her you were paying attention during the conversation.
And then strike while the iron is hot and ask her out a second time. There is a window period to follow up with a second date after the first date and it is usually advisable that you ask for a second date a week or two after the first date. If you wait too long, she will lose interest and move on.
WHAT IF I DON’T WANT A SECOND DATE? WHAT TO DO AFTER THE FIRST DATE IF IT DID NOT GO AS PLANNED.
If the first date did not go too well and you have a feeling she may say no to a second date, it is not the end of the world. You will still meet another interesting woman/girl. Being single and alone in the meantime is not at all bad. You can be single and very happy. And while you wait for the next first date, don’t stop taking care of yourself. Remember that one bad date is not the end of the world, but a lesson learned.
It is advisable though that you still call her to thank her for her time and to tell her you had a good time. If there was something negative you may have done during the date, it would be a good time to apologize for it. And who knows, maybe that call would soften her and make her change her stance somewhat towards you. You may be pleasantly surprised that a second date that seemed unlikely would come about because of that call.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
1. How do you get a girl to fall in love with you on the first date?
Getting a girl to fall in love with you on the first date is not guaranteed and depends from one girl to the next. One thing that is sure though is that if she enjoyed the first date very much, she would look forward to a second date and spending more time with you, and in that way fall head over heels in love with you.
2. What to do on a first date with a girl and how to impress on a first date?
Do any of the 11 things we list in this article and you are sure to impress her on your first date.
3. How to treat a girl on a first date?
Treat her like a queen and like she’s the only thing that matters at that moment.
4. Where to bring/take a girl on a first date?
According to the survey referred to in this article, most women would love a nice sit-down meal in a restaurant for a first date. Take her to a nice restaurant and don’t forget to follow the guidelines listed in this article.
5. What to say to a girl on a first date?
Talk about her and get to learn more about her.
6. How to go on a date with a girl?
Ask her out and plan the date following the guidelines in this article.
7. What type of things to do with a girl you like?
You can take her to a restaurant, take a romantic walk, go for a concert or to a bowling alley or an amusement park.
Women on a first date want to feel special and liked. They want the man to make her feel great. When you think through the questions listed in this article before embarking on that date and make the important preparations, you are sure to make any girl feel extra special and get her to look forward to another date with you.
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