23 Ways How to Make Your Husband Feel Appreciated and Loved

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  • Making your husband feel appreciated and loved is one of the important keys to a successful and long-lasting marriage. Find out in this article, 23 ways to make your husband feel special, appreciated and loved.

The institution of marriage is one that is constantly changing in recent times. More and more Americans (especially in the age bracket of 18 – 49) are starting to take the view that the institution is becoming obsolete if a 2010 survey is anything to go by. This would possibly explain the sharp decline in marriages between 1960 and 2010 seen in the second chart (from another 2010 survey).

Do you agree that marriage is becoming obsolete?(October 2010, by age) Source: Statista

Do you agree that marriage is becoming obsolete(October 2010, by age)

Share of married adults in the United States in 1960 and 2010, by age. Source: Statista

Share of married adults in the United States in 1960 and 2010, by age.

This disenchantment may also explain why divorce rates are almost as high as the marriage rate. In 2019 alone, there were 266,322,302 marriages, and an alarming 28,918,962 divorces in the same year, according to Census.Gov. This is more than 10% of marriages in that year.

Marital status of the U.S. population in 2019, by sex (in millions) Source: Statista

Marital status of the U.S. population in 2019, by sex (in millions)

Number of divorced individuals in the United States in 2019, by age and sex. Source: Census.Gov

Number of divorced individuals in the United States in 2019, by age and sex.

This begs the question of what the problem could be. Why are so many marriages falling apart? Most failed marriages cite irreconcilable differences as the reason for its failure. Irreconcilable differences is a fancy way of saying the parties were no longer happy with each other, for one or more reasons. Often, these reasons start at a very minute level, and because they are not attended to at that level, they get so big that they bring the marriage to a breaking point.

One area that is a breeding ground for growing discontent and a feeling of irreconcilable differences, is the area of spouse appreciation. If one of the spouses feels that despite all they do in making the marriage work, the other hardly acknowledges or appreciates it, it does not take long for the marriage to tether on the brink of a complete breakdown.

This is why this article will provide the answer to one side of the coin, which is how to make your husband feel appreciated and loved. In this article, we will be showing you what makes a man feel appreciated. The man in this case is your husband, and those principles will also apply to him. We will also show you practical ways of how to let him know you appreciate and love him.

Also, check out our related article on Things a girl wants to hear from her boyfriend.

What Makes A Man (Your Husband) Feel Loved And Appreciated?

Table of Contents

For a marriage to be successful, it requires work and commitment by both parties. Some of the work and commitment that it involves can be seen from this survey of some married and unmarried adults about what it takes to have a successful marriage.

Keys to a successful marriage. Source: Pinterest

Keys to a successful marriage.

Also important is a constant acknowledgment and appreciation of the weight that each party pulls in making the marriage work. Both parties have a shared interest in constantly acknowledging and appreciating each other. And this is important because it tells your spouse that you see what they are doing for you and that it means a lot to you that they are that invested and committed to the marriage and you.

When it comes to your husband, these are the top 7 things that make him feel appreciated and loved. Some of them also appear on the chart in this section and will be expanded upon.

Showing Him That He Is Relevant And Important To You.

Men by their nature are problem-solvers. This is what drives them most. And even in their marriages or any other intimate relationship, they also want to feel like they can be of help in helping you deal with any challenges you may have, however minute.

He wants to know that his usefulness and importance to you is not just for the sex and that you also want and need him in other important things that he is capable of doing. The next section will cover practical ways on how you can achieve this.

Acknowledging His Efforts, Even In The Seeming Little Things.

This is especially important for when he helps out around the house with things like chores and DIY things that need to be fixed around the house.

When he does even seemingly small things like fixing the pipes around the house, show him that you appreciate that effort. Even if you take the view that it is what he is supposed to do in terms of your divided roles in the house, still appreciate him for doing it.

Being overly critical and unappreciative of what he does for you and the family around the house will only make him unhappy and bring a growing distance between the two of you. Even if his method may not be your preference, first acknowledge and appreciate it first, before going off on how he could have done it better to your taste.

Being Loving, Caring, Helpful, and Supportive Of His Decisions.

This is another important one. Your husband wants to know that he can count on you when it matters most to him. Such times include when he has his hands full at work and may not be able to help out as much at home, or when he needs all the help he can get. Another time he wants to count on you is support when he wants to make a decision. Even if you may not agree with it, your support tells him that you trust his sense of judgment and have no reason to second-guess it or doubt him.

When you show him your love in this way, it tells him you appreciate him enough to stand by him and are ready and willing to help him when he needs it the most.

Showing Him Your Love In Passionate And Romantic Ways.

Romance is very important in any relationship, and even your husband wants you to show him passion and romance as much as you want him to do the same. Being passionate and romantic to him tells him that you appreciate his passion and romance by reciprocating it.

Taking An Active Interest In His Life And The Things That Matter To Him.

Your husband wants to also feel like you see him and care about the things he cares about. He would be very happy and feel very special and loved if you can enjoy some of his hobbies with him. The only way to find out what his hobbies are and what the things he cares about are is by asking him and then acting accordingly.

Listening To Him.

Nothing is as upsetting as the feeling that you’re not being heard. This is as annoying for your husband, as it is for you. He wants to know that when he’s speaking you are there in the zone and paying attention rather than being absent-minded or distracted.

Never Stop Working On Yourself And Being A Better You.

Marriage should never be an excuse to stop working on yourself. Your husband wants to know that you will not use being married as an excuse to become complacent on those things that attracted him to you in the first place. In this way, he knows that you still want to keep him attracted to you by continuing to be your hot and attractive self. Men love showing off their women, and always giving him to show off his savvy and smart wife will make him one of the happiest men alive because whether you believe it or not, you are his pride.

How To Let Him Know You Appreciate And Love HimWays To Make Your Husband Feel Special.

When it comes to each of the 7 things listed earlier that makes him feel appreciated, these are some practical ways to show him appreciation in those 7 areas:

Showing Him That He Is Relevant And Important To You.

You show him that he is relevant and important to you in these ways.

1. Actively seeking his counsel on important things that matter to you.

When you want to tackle that problem at work, ask him what he thinks.

Two heads are always better than one. With his outside perspective, he will give you a perspective you may not have thought of because of being closely and emotionally invested in the problem.

  • When you’re having a hard time figuring things out, ask him to be your sounding board for bouncing off ideas and thinking of strategies.

Men love this one very much. It gives them a chance to dazzle, shine, and do what they do best.

  • If any of the children are giving you a hard time, talk to him about it, and let him handle it.

Fathers are usually less emotional in their approach to handling their children when they become a little challenging, and this is what you need in those circumstances.

2. Involving him before taking major decisions, even if it may be your prerogative.

This does not mean that before buying even the smallest things like groceries for the house, you need to involve him. But where it involves major decisions like spending a large amount of money on purchasing something, it always makes him feel like a key part of your life if you involve him.

And you don’t necessarily have to seek his approval, especially if you’re buying it for yourself. Seeking his views and opinions on it is what will make the world of difference to him. And not to mention that he will have valuable insight that will help you make a good purchase.

To give a practical example, say you wanted to buy yourself a car. Even if you are making the purchase with money from other sources that are not part of your joint estate, you would make him feel special by telling him before buying the car that you wanted to buy a car and asking what he thinks about the car model you are interested in buying.

3. Not emasculating him if you happen to earn more than him.

According to a 2012 survey, as high as 29% of wives earned more than their husbands.

Percent of wives who earn more than their husbands in married couple households in the United States from 1990 to 2012. Source: Statista

Percent of wives who earn more than their husbands in married couple households in the United States from 1990 to 2012.

It does happen sometimes, though not all the time, that some wives who are in that position start to make their husbands feel terrible by constantly rubbing in the fact that they earn more, in the way they treat and address him. They look down on him and eat away at his confidence by the contemptuous and disrespectful way in which they treat him.

Don’t be that woman/wife. If you earn more than your husband, let it never be something you rub in his face to make him feel like less of a man, or he’ll resent you and pull away. The way you speak to him and address him should not change because you earn more than him. Things around the house should not suddenly have your name tagged to it because you earn more than him.

If you eat away at your husband’s confidence, you will have a very unhappy husband and an unhappy home headed for a divorce.

4. Letting him make the important financial decisions of the house.

This is another component of number 3 above. Even if you earn more, allow him to still feel very much like part of the important decision-making process in the family by letting him make the important financial decisions of the house such as how much to spend on buying the family home and other important family expenses.

When you allow him to be himself in this way, you are giving him a chance to do one of the things he enjoys doing, which is to fix problems. You also tell him that you value and trust his sense of judgment.

You will love this related article on Financial Things To Do After Getting Married, for tips on some financial things you can do together with your hubby.

Acknowledging His Efforts, Even In The Seeming Little Things.

Show him that you value even the seemingly small things in these ways.

5. Verbally thank him for small things like taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and the likes.

Verbalize your appreciation for the things he does around the house. Tell him this every chance you get. This tells him that you see what he is doing to help and you are grateful for it.

6. Buy him little thank you gifts.

It can either be a nice DIY set, a yummy gift basket, or even a hand-written thank you note with a box of chocolates. Our article on Gifts For Snackers has a good selection of yummy gift baskets. You can even make it exciting by surprising him with these gifts.

Related articles: Surprise birthday ideas for husband with family and Non-Food Thank You Gifts.

Being Loving, Caring, Helpful, and Supportive Of His Decisions.

Show your loving, caring, supportive, and helpful side in any of these ways.

7. Support his decisions even if you don’t always agree with him.

Tell him that you may not agree with his decision at that given point, but that he has your full support and backing on it. Your support means a lot to him than you know, and it will make him happy knowing that he can count on it at all times.

8. Trusting his sense of judgment.

This also goes hand in hand with supporting him. Trust his sense of judgment and refrain from second-guessing him at every turn. Trust that he knows what he’s doing, and trust his decision-making processes. Knowing that you trust his sense of judgment will give him a confidence boost that would keep him a better version of himself.

9. Help him with his share of the chores where he is overwhelmed with other equally important things.

There will be times when he may not be able to help out at the house with his share of the chores because he is overwhelmed with trying to earn a living for the family. Part of being a loving and supportive wife is to be understanding and caring to help him the best way you can. He will also reciprocate the gesture when you are in the same position.

Helping him in this way tells him that you acknowledge and appreciate the importance of the other important work that he does, and that you are willing to do whatever you can to create an enabling environment for him to be able to do his work.

10. Ask him if he needs help and what he needs help with.

When you actively ask him ways you can help him, you communicate to him that he can count on you in the same way you count on him. And even if he doesn’t have anything you can help him with, he’ll appreciate the thoughtful gesture in asking.

Showing Him Your Love In Passionate And Romantic Ways.

Love, passion, and romance remain as important in your marriage as they were when you were dating. Your husband also wants passionate and romantic gestures from you to make him feel special and loved.

11. Compliment him all the time on how he looks.

Men also love getting compliments on their appearance the same way their partner loves them. He wants to know that he is smoking hot and attractive and that you find him very hot and attractive. So every time compliment him on how dashing he looks. When he gets that pretty haircut or is looking freshly clean-shaven, tell him. If his clothes fit him well and make him look dapper, tell him.

12. Spoil and pamper him as often as possible.

It’s not only women that love being spoiled and pampered. Even men, including your husband, love it too. You can spoil and pamper him in any of these ways that are by no means exhaustive:

  • Book him for a full body massage. You can also book for both of you as well.
  • Take him shopping for either a new pair of shoes, clothing items, or accessories like watches and colognes.
  • Buy him his favorite collector item, cologne, shoes, clothes, etc.
  • Take him out to a fancy restaurant.
  • Prepare him his favorite meal.
  • Buy him love keepsakes that he can carry around every day to remind him about you.

13. Write to him love-letters.

The art of writing love-letters is slowly becoming a lost art in the game of love. Keep things passionate and fresh between you and your husband by occasionally writing him a love-letter to tell him just how much you love and appreciate him.

You can even make it exciting by slipping this into places like his pockets in the cloth he has to wear to work. And when he gets to work and puts his hands in his pockets, he is met with a sweet surprising love-letter from his loving wife.

14. Send a romantic package to him at work with a romantic message.

Every once in a while you can buy a romantic gift basket with a loving message on it and have it delivered to him at his place of work.

15. Always keep things in the bedroom exciting.

Sex is important and it is almost usually the case that men generally love sex more than women, although there are exceptions to this. Keeping things exciting in the bedroom makes him feel very desired and this will in turn make him feel special and loved.

When it comes to keeping things exciting in the bedroom, the key is to be as adventurous as possible. Don’t place any limits on what you can both do. The only limit you have is your imagination. Ask him what his fantasies are and play out your fantasies with him too. This reciprocal give and take are very healthy and helpful to the marriage, even as the chart on keys for a successful marriage shows.

16. Bring him breakfast in bed.

Men also love breakfasts in bed. You can surprise him now and again by telling him to stay in for breakfast in bed if he is an early-riser that leaves the bed very early. If he isn’t, it will be really sweet to wake up earlier and prepare and bring him his breakfast in bed with a sweet love-letter and let that be the first thing he wakes up to. He will fall head over heels in love with you all over again.

All these gestures of love and passion tell your husband that you are still crazily in love with him as much as when you first met, if not more. This will surely make him feel very special and loved.

You will also love our married couples romantic ideas articles: Romantic Evening Ideas For Married Couples and 6 Ideas For A Romantic Night In A Hotel.

Taking An Active Interest In His Life And The Things That Matter To Him.

He will feel special and loved when you take an active interest in the things that matter to him in the following ways.

17. Have at least one day in the week where you hang out with him.

Hanging out as a couple is as important in your marriage as it was when you were dating. You can hang out in any of the following ways that are by no means exhaustive:

  • Date night or date lunches;
  • Taking romantic walks in the park;
  • Having a romantic picnic;
  • Having a games day where you play as many games as possible;
  • A lazy day in bed where you spend a full day in bed enjoying each other.

18. Give him alone time.

He would love to have his space sometimes and knowing that you give him that will make him feel so happy and loved.

Sometimes he may be hesitant to suggest it because he does not know how you may take it. So, take the initiative and tell him that you’re cool with it and in fact want him to always have his alone time so that he is constantly refreshed. This will also allow you to have your time at the same time.

19. Ask him what his hobbies are and actively do them together.

This is sweet and will make him feel special. If he loves sport, for example, join him in watching the sport and even going for a live game if he’s into watching live games. You can also support his teams and learn the basics of the sports he loves so that he can also share his joy at a game with you.

Whatever his hobbies are, tell him you’re also interested in doing them together with him. He would be happy that he has a new playmate in you.

Related article: Hobbies For Couples In Their 20s.

20. Spend time with his family as much as possible.

His family is an important part of his life. They matter very much to him, and it will make him happy that you spend time with them. Nothing makes a man quite happy like seeing his wife get along with every member of his family, especially his mum and sisters.

And even if you may not always have time to spend with them, occasionally have family get-togethers to bring your family and his family together to promote unity and cohesion among both of your families.

Related article: Benefits Of Families Exercising Together.

Listening To Him.

You can listen to him in any of the following ways:

21. Have a day in the week where you guys just talk.

The conversation does not have to be structured. Those topics and issues that you are both very passionate about, make it a habit that at least once a week you both sit around the fireplace or over a cup of coffee or when watching TV, to just talk and listen to each other.

Never Stop Working On Yourself And Being A Better You.

He wants to still see the beautiful smart woman he fell in love with. When you continue working on yourself to remain beautiful and attractive, you make your husband very happy. You can do this in any of the following ways.

22. Do not let yourself go.

  • Exercise and workout.

You don’t have to sculpt the perfect abs but never let yourself go. Remember that one of the things he fell in love with about you is the way you looked.

  • Keep your appearance groomed and attractive.

Your dressing and sense of fashion and style is also another thing that attracted him to you, and you should not lose it. Even in marriage, continue to have him out of breath with your sense of fashion and style.

23. Challenge yourself with a daring venture.

It can be as small as learning a new language, or as big as being financially savvy and making good investment decisions that pay off and helps the family. Whatever it is you are passionate about, work at it with perfection, and be the best at it. When you are at your best, you make him the happiest and proudest man among his peers.

Final Tips On Applying The Practical Ways To Make Your Husband Feel Special.

Now that you have the practical ways to make your husband feel special, the method of delivery is also very important. These 3 tips will make the delivery have the desired effect.

Be Creative.

Creativity is very important when it comes to applying any of these ways. Creativity will keep things exciting between you and your husband.

When it comes to being creative, the only limit is your imagination. You know your husband better, and what he likes and gets excited with. Use these creatively in delivering your appreciation to him.

Be Spontaneous.

Routine can be dull and boring. If he gets accustomed to expecting it at certain times, it won’t have the same effect it had the first, second, and third time. Always keep him guessing and be sporadic and spontaneous about it. For instance, he could just be making a cup of coffee and you waltz in and give him a passionate kiss just because. When he never expects it and it comes, the surprise of it always leaves a warm fuzzy feeling behind.

Follow Your Husband’s Love Language.

In case you were wondering what the term “love language” means, this is coined from the famous bestseller by Gary Chapman called The Five Love Languages. In broad terms, these love languages are words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, spending quality time, and physical touch. We each have all of these to some degree, but one always stands out over the rest, and it is that one that stands out that is your love language.

You know your husband and what his love language would be. And if you don’t know, you can take the quiz here to find out what it is. Armed with that knowledge, show him your appreciation in his love language, and he will value and appreciate it even more.

Related article: What To Say To Your Boyfriend To Make Him Happy.

Frequently Asked Questions.

1. In what ways can you appreciate your partner?

Doing any of the 23 things listed in this article are ways to show your partner that you appreciate them.

2. How can you be nurturing to your man?

Taking care of him in the ways suggested in this article are good ways to be nurturing to your man.

3. How can you make him feel better?

Make him feel loved and you would have brightened his day and made him feel better.

4. What makes a guy happy?

All 23 ways listed in this article are things that make guys happy.

5. What makes a man feel loved?

Your love, care, support, and appreciation is what makes him feel loved. All the ways listed in this article will convey your love, care, support, and appreciation.

6. I am interested in making my husband happy, can you help?

Certainly. And that is exactly what this article does for you. Following all the steps set out in this article will help you in making your husband a very happy man.

Conclusion.

A successful marriage requires commitment and active participation by both spouses. By showing your husband you love and appreciate him through any of the ways listed here, you play your part in strengthening the core of your marriage. And a happy husband will always reciprocate to make his wife happy and satisfied too.

A happy home means a reduction in the high divorce rate in the country. Never stop working on your marriage and appreciating your husband in all the right ways. This article lists all the right ways that you can do it.

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